


It's Not Over Yet

by heytheregisela



Series: end of the world [2]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Blood, Death, M/M, Mavin, Violence, Zombie Apocalypse, but not major character death, dirty and clean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-20
Updated: 2015-11-04
Packaged: 2018-04-22 12:00:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 35,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4834562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heytheregisela/pseuds/heytheregisela
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[<a href="http://archiveofourown.org/works/3292223/chapters/7185326">Mini sequel to Dirty and Clean</a>]</p><p>Approximately fourteen months have passed. The group is still together, except for Michael, who is believed to be long dead. Gavin has come to terms with it. At least that’s what he tells himself every night.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Alright, I missed writing zombies and all of this stuff, so I thought “why not?” I was going to just add this as an epilogue, but I wanted to make it a bit longer. I’m also in an awful mood to write a lot of angst. Also, this might just be 5 parts, but I didn’t make it a set number just in case I pull a self and make it longer (or even shorter).

“Oh, sure, just send Joel out to do all the work by himself,” Joel muttered to himself as he shook his head. There was no use complaining, though. He could understand everyone else had their respected jobs. He just couldn't fathom why he had to go out on a supply run on his own. Usually they went in pairs, for obvious reasons. However, this time, everyone was just _too_ busy to join him. Adam was stuck protecting their area and belongings with Burnie in case looters decided to pay them a visit. Lindsay and Meg were repairing broken weapons. Chris and Ashley were attempting to make meals with what food they had saved.

So that left Joel to be the only one available to go on a search for anything useful. They were running low of a various amount of things. It was safe to say they were all pretending a little too hard that they weren't worried. Joel came to a stop by an abandoned and totaled truck for a quick rest. He wondered how long he'd been walking for, but at least he knew which direction to go in to return to everyone. He whipped around at the distant sound of a growl. It sounded vaguely close, though wherever it was, he was certain it hadn't seen him or anything.

Reaching down to place a hand on his holster, he stepped toward where the growl seemed to have to come from. He crouched down when he heard it again – closer this time. Around the corner... that's where it had to be. Joel took a deep breath to prepare himself, but just as he jumped up, he heard its anguish cry and he furrowed his eyebrows. Apparently he wasn't as alone as he thought he was.

When the body hit the ground, Joel quietly moved against the wall before peeking over to see who he had for company. Their back was to him as they continued digging into the creature's head with a glass shard. Although, something about their shaggy light brown hair was familiar to him. The squishy and wet sounds had Joel pursing his lips in disgust. That stranger did know the creature was completely dead already, right?

Finally, they stopped their brutal and useless prodding and stood up. Joel's hand remained hovering over his pistol. Other humans became more and more of a threat everyday to people who weren't apart of their group. Joel swallowed roughly, realizing how dry his mouth was and froze slightly as the person turned around. He looked no older than thirty with that facial hair he had going on. He also looked like he could use a week's worth of food, but then again, they all could. This guy looked particularly thin, though. There was a dark glint to his dull green eyes, but Joel found himself staring at the faint scar going across his right cheek. And that torn jacket he was wearing... it was evident he'd been attacked various of times.

“I know you're there,” the man spoke. Joel raised his eyebrows. Oh, he was British too, which also seemed familiar. What did it matter? He'd been caught.

Joel sighed deeply and walked around the corner to reveal himself. Normally he wouldn't do this, give up his hiding spot so easily, but he had a strange faith that this guy wouldn't kill him on the spot.

“Saw what you did there,” he said, keeping his tone gentle. “No mercy, huh?”

“Joel,” the guy blandly responded and Joel stiffened.

“Wha- I'm sorry...” Joel cleared his throat. “How do you know me?” He squinted his eyes.

“Do you not remember me? I remember you, even if I only knew you for less than a day.”

Joel was feeling uneasy now and it had a lot to do with the lack of emotional the Brit spoke with. And then the actual things he was saying. “Remember- what? When did we meet? Was this before hell broke loose or-”

“No, idiot. I'm Gavin,” the guy cut him off. “You... you were part of Carter's group.” Joel's expression immediately softened. He had almost forgotten all about those times. Almost.

“Gavin, right,” he nodded, averting his eyes as he thought back to it. “Michael's boyfriend.” He missed how Gavin's eyes widened for a second. “How is he?” He faced Gavin again and blinked in surprise to find him glaring.

“Dead,” Gavin bitterly answered that Joel could have sworn he got chills.

“Okay, good talk,” Joel whispered to himself. He rubbed his chin as he thought about what to say next. From Gavin's group, the only person he knew well enough was Aaron. Between Gavin and Michael, however, he had gotten to know Michael _slightly_ during their short time together, but it was still more than he got to know Gavin. With another sigh, he locked eyes with the Brit and offered a small, sympathetic smile.

“I'm sor-” but Gavin stopped him with a wave of his hand.

“Sorry?” Gavin snorted. “Death happens, Joel. Are you forgetting how we live now?” He ruffled his own hair and Joel noticed how uneven it was. It seemed caring about people wasn't the only thing Gavin had stopped caring about.

“Right,” Joel nodded, taking a step closer. They flinched as they heard close growls. One... two... three... four... oh, it was plenty more than that, and they were heading right for Joel and Gavin.

“God damnit,” Gavin breathed out before turning and taking off down the street. Joel frantically searched around for a place to hide. Every building nearby was boarded or covered by too many vehicles to move in a hurry. He spun back around to look where Gavin had taken off.

“Wha- _wait_!”

 _Errr-rah!_ Joel glanced over his shoulder to see _them_ appear. They instantly spotted him and picked up their pace. Joel started to run in the other direction, able to keep a decent distance and fortunately, it didn't look like they were getting any faster than that. Joel's problem now was that he had lost track of Gavin, but he was sure Gavin had to have run into one of the buildings. He kept an eye out for anything and tried to ignore the loud increase of growls from behind.

When he felt someone grab his arm, he yanked his pistol out, though he did nothing further than that as he was met with Gavin's face instead of a rotten, disfigured one. Gavin furrowed his eyebrows as he sneaked a peek over at the herd, but he quickly pulled Joel through the nearest open door. Joel barely caught himself from stumbling. The steel door was slammed shut and they were embedded in darkness. They could hear each other's breathing and the creatures banging at the door, clawing and growling at it like the starving savages they were. There was a sudden brightness that hit Joel's eyes, causing him to shield his face for a moment until he realized Gavin was holding a small flashlight.

“It isn't much, but it's something,” Gavin murmured, shining the light at a flight of stairs in front of them.

“How the hell are we getting out of here?” Joel asked.

“We definitely can't wait them out. They're smarter than you think.”

“So we go up higher and hope we can find a a way out?”

“I see no other option. _Do you_?” Joel almost rolled his eyes at the condescending tone Gavin was using.

“Lead the way,” Joel gestured toward the stairs, “You're the one with the light.” Gavin gave him a nod and began making his way up. Joel took a deep breath. This wasn't what was supposed to happen. He was supposed to be back by sundown. At this rate, he would be back by the next day.

“I have no problem leaving you behind from here,” he heard Gavin call out. Joel did roll his eyes this time, but he started to follow finally.

“I was going to thank you for helping me back there-”

“You're welcome.”

Joel laughed, though it lacked any sort of joy. Annoyance was rising in him by the second. “You're... _hmm_ , you're something.” Gavin said nothing in response and Joel couldn't decide if he was grateful about that or not.

They ended up reaching a floor with windows and Gavin turned off his flashlight, the light from outside providing them with more than enough ways to see. He went about to navigate the area. Joel did as well, seeing if he could get something out of this mess to take back with him.

“Are you still with everyone else?” He casually asked. Despite having new-found mixed feeling about Gavin, he also couldn't stand the silence between them. Gavin paused his movements of looking through a drawer to glance at Joel. Such a blank expression he was wearing.

“Yes,” he replied.

“Okay,” Joel turned away to walk into the next room, but his curiosity was gnawing at him. “Okay,” he repeated, gaining Gavin's attention. “Would I be _completely_ terrible if I asked what happened?” Gavin blinked and raised his eyebrows. Joel looked at him apologetically, “The last time we saw each other, we all made sure we were ready to go. We gave each other anything we needed and went our separate ways without being found. Or...” his eyes widened, “ _were_ you guys eventually found?” The corners of Gavin's lips rose and Joel wondered how something could look so cold and forced.

“I was wondering when you were going to ask,” Gavin told him. “Took longer than I thought.”

“I was kind of busy _running away_!”

“Hmm, right. Well, Michael... sweet little Michael, always looked after others first. That was his greatest mistake,” Gavin picked up a small box and shook it to hear bullets rumbling around inside. Joel waited silently for him to continue as he leaned against the door frame with arms folded across his chest. Gavin packed away the box and sighed.

“It didn't take him too long to heal from that night. He couldn't wait to get back into action and help out with anything he could. For a while, everything went smoothly. We saw many days, _months,_ pass. We didn't have any worries and that's where we were wrong. One night while we were heading back, I couldn't hold myself back anymore and we-”

“-Okay, I think I know where you're getting at. Skip those details,” Joel interjected.

Gavin obliged, “-anyway, after we were done and getting dressed, we heard a car coming our way. Their headlights made it difficult for us to see anything, but we heard doors opening and voices. They told us to get down on our knees...”

“ _We said '_ get down' _!” One of them screamed, the outline of his body coming into view in front of the lights._

_Gavin swallowed the lump in his throat and glanced at Michael who was staring forward, hardened expression and hands curled into fists. Gavin wanted nothing more than to reach out for him, but he felt frozen in place._

“ _If I have to say it again, assholes,” the man brought up his shotgun, followed by his friends, and Gavin thought someone had punched the air out of him._

“ _Babe,” Michael whispered, just loud enough for Gavin to hear him. Gavin nodded once to let him know he heard, and then he tensed when he felt Michael's hand over his. “Run.” It was one word. A simple demand. But Gavin was too afraid to obey. Even so, with his legs feeling weak, Gavin managed to make himself turn and_ go. _The gunshots went flying, but the two ducked underneath tree branches, running in zig-zag forms to throw them off. They could have gotten away if they hadn't run into an edge where their only hope was to roll down the steep hill or attempt to go left or right. With the car catching up with them, they knew rolling down would be their best bet._

“ _On the count of three, okay?” Michael whispered as he leaned closer to Gavin. Gavin took a deep breath and nodded, but they both spun around as the car came to a screeching stop in front of them. His stomach was turning and his heart was hammering wildly in his chest. They shouldn't have stopped, but there hadn't been any sign of anyone living for miles. They thought they were safe._

_Two men hopped out of their car and stepped in front of Hummer. Gavin was ready to surrender if it meant he and Michael would be okay. Although, he assumed they had ruined their chances of possibly getting to live when they ran off like that._

“Get.Down _,” one of them barked. Gavin did, much to Michael's dismay._

“ _Gav,” Michael whispered._

“ _Michael,” Gavin whispered in return, staring up at his boyfriend with pleading eyes. Michael pursed his lips, silently debating it to himself before simply getting down on his knees next to him. They brought their hands up and the men walked up to them to begin their rough search of supplies. At least they had left their best supplies back with everyone else..._

“ _What do they have?” Someone still in the car asked._

_Gavin avoided all eye contact with the man searching him, padding him throughout his body._

“ _Nothing much,” the man mumbled. “If you guys ain't got shit, why'd ya run? We coulda gone easy on you both.” He was staring directly into Gavin's eyes, but Gavin still refused to look at him._

_The other guy searching Michael was just about to take his hunting knife when Michael grabbed at it first and plunged it into the guy's neck. Gavin held his breath as Michael went on to quickly do the same to the man searching him._

_It was practically a blur afterward – how Michael yanked Gavin up on his feet, how the rest of the men rushed out of the truck with their weapons ready to fire, how one second Gavin was holding onto Michael and the next he was being pushed back and tumbling down the dried out hill. His skin burned against the rough dirt, lone branches left their marks across his arms, and rocks imprinted their sharp touch as he rolled over them._

“ _Ah!” A scream that sounded like it came from Michael in the middle of the chaos of loud blows and grunts._

_Gavin landed face first at the bottom, limbs weak from the impact. The gunshots had stopped. He lifted his head and his vision was blurred. After various blinking, he managed to see better. He could hear water. That's it... that's all he heard. Just the sounds of water flowing nearby. No gunshots. No voices. No Michael._

_Gavin gasped and jumped right up, though his entire body protested and he cried out slightly at its sensitivity. His heart was back its painful speed and he was about ready to be sick all over the ground._

“ _Mi-Michael!” He tried. Nothing. No... “_ MICHAEL _!” Silence. Gavin bent over, but he attempted as best as he could to hold it together. After spitting out a little, he rushed forward and climbed back up. It certainly was much easier falling down the damn thing than climbing it, but Gavin grabbed onto anything he could and ignored the need to rest. He had to see. He just had to see. Even if it meant the worst, at least he would know._

_His body trembled further the closer he got, though. Reaching the top, he pulled himself up, eyes shut tight and teeth clenched. And when he opened his eyes, his mouth fell open as he came face to face with a dead man with his eyes rolled back._

“ _Bloody hell,” Gavin shakily said. Yes, his stomach was having a terrible time. He swallowed hard and got the rest of the way up. Four bodies lying around. Two were the men Michael had stabbed and two others seemed to have been shot in the head. Gavin was used to see this sort of sight, yet the fact that none of them were Michael and he had no other_ fucking _idea where Michael could be made him heave._

 _He wanted to believe,_ so _badly, that this meant Michael was alive. If that were so, then where was he? Gavin bit down on his lower lip and looked up. He gasped as he noticed the truck was gone, but in its place lied a small pile of things. Gavin ran over and dropped down next to it to inspect, though his heart dropped with him when he saw what the things were: the diamond pendant necklace, what looked to be a small handful of Michael's hair (which Gavin cringed at the thought of how that happened), and Michael's jacket that was covered in fresh blood. If there had been five people in total, that fifth person must have done something to Michael before driving away. Maybe even going as far as taking Michael's dead body with him for his own_ sick _pleasure._

_Gavin picked up the necklace tentatively. His lower lip quivered while he looked it over. “You idiot,” he mouthed._

Joel frowned, looking anywhere but at Gavin. Eventually, he opened his mouth to speak, but Gavin rushed past him, bumping his shoulder on his way out.

“I've got everything in there. Let's go through the next room and then we'll try the fire escape,” the Brit sounded so casual, as if he was absolutely unfazed by the story he had just told.

Joel sputtered. He really had no idea what to say now.

 

* * *

 

“Whoa, easy there,” Aaron laughed as he tried holding the punching bag in place from Barbara's unforgiving punch at it. Barbara grinned at him, taking a step back to catch her breath.

“Think one day I'll be able to _punch_ one of those fuckers to death?” She asked him.

“I think you could punch _me_ to death if you wanted to.”

Barbara shook her head, smile lingering on her face as she turned away to face the rest of the garage. It was part of their newest place. They didn't expect to stay there long. They never stayed anywhere long anymore, not long enough to get attached. Barbara threw her arms up to stretch and in the midst of opening her eyes, something in the corner caught her eye. Letting her arms fall at her side, her smile faltered as she made her way to the wooden board hanging on the wall. It used to be for tools, but now it just had tally marks carved into it and she knew exactly who put them there.

“What's that?” Aaron asked her.

“Gavin's counting down the days,” she responded. Aaron cocked an eyebrow and wandered over to her side for a better look.

“To what?”

“How many days it's been since...” Barbara rubbed the back of her neck and sighed, “since Michael died.” She wasn't quite sure why she chose to lower her voice there; Gavin wasn't in the house.

“Oh,” Aaron averted his eyes.

“He won't actually admit that's what this is, but he makes sure to do it everywhere we stay, and I've also been counting the days in my head since I noticed him doing this a while ago. One hundred and eighty-five days.”

“Wow. I can't believe it's been that long.”

“Must feel much longer to him.”

“And I was actually starting to believe that he was getting better about the whole thing.”

Barbara turned to stare at Aaron in disbelief. “This is _Gavin_ we're talking about,” she said, “When I _met_ him, the first thing he asked was 'Where's Michael?'. I didn't know him. How the hell was I supposed to know who this _Michael_ was. But my point is, it's going to take longer than six months for him to move on, and even when he does, Michael will still be a part of him.”

“You're right. He doesn't... he doesn't really talk anymore,” Aaron told her, reaching a hand up to touch the marks on the wood, “He'll only answer if he has to and ask questions when he needs to. If he smiles, you kind of wish he wouldn't, because it looks painful for him to do it. He's-”

“He's not really Gavin,” Barbara finished for him. Aaron nodded.

“Yeah, he's not. I know none of us are really who we used to be either, but it's hard seeing him this way. It's hard seeing him shut us out and bottle up everything.” He put his hand down and slumped his shoulders. Barbara licked her lips, wishing a little that she hadn't pointed the tally marks at all. It was best that they kept their spirits up, even if that felt impossible and childish sometimes. But she was tired of hurting and was yearning to feel anything else. So, she hurried back to the punching bag and slapped it with the back of her hand. The noise was enough to whip Aaron's head in her direction.

“Come on; it's your turn,” and she smiled at him as he approached.

 


	2. Chapter 2

While Gavin engaged himself with cleaning out the next room of anything useful he could find, Joel walked up to the window where the fire escape was. He peeked his head out and looked down, frowning slightly at what he saw.

“We'll have to jump, because this doesn't reach the ground,” he called out to Gavin.

“That's fine. We aren't too far up. It won't kill us.”

Joel stepped away from the window and turned to find Gavin already making his way up to him. He nodded toward the window and asked, “Would you like to go first then?” Gavin shrugged a shoulder in reply, but he did quickly hop out of the window. Joel was about to follow suit when they heard the metal squeak. Gavin stood completely still as he waited for another squeak to happen. It never did. They both sighed in relief and Gavin ushered Joel out of the window. The Brit pointed out that part of the stairs that had led down was still intact. He carefully began to descend them before making his jump to the ground.

Joel took one step and froze as he saw one of those things attempting to sneak up from behind Gavin while Gavin was staring up at him. “ _Gavin_!” Gavin squeezed his eyebrows together. It took him a moment too long to realize what Joel's warning meant and he wasn't able to turn around in time. The creature wrapped its arms around his neck. It went to bite the side of Gavin's face, but Gavin did manage to reach his hands back and hold its head away from him. Joel leaped off the steps and pulled out his pistol. Although, instead of going for a shot, he used the handgun to give the creature with half of its face rotted away a plunder on top of its head. It released Gavin, turning its attention on Joel, but Joel got in another hit before it had its chance of regaining itself.

As it stumbled over, Gavin brought his leg up and kicked it on its side. The creature fell onto the ground, making strangled noises and whines of agony. Joel was going to use his gun to give it a few more hits, but he was pushed back by Gavin and gaped as Gavin stomped his foot down on its head. Sure he'd seen Burnie and Lindsay do that a lot, but he hadn't expected someone like Gavin to make it look so simple. Gavin continued to twist his foot around and it sounded as if someone was stepping on a bag filled with jell-o with shells thrown into the mix.

“Alright, enough,” Joel said, grabbing Gavin by the elbow to stop him. Gavin pulled away immediately and snarled at Joel, and Joel held his hands up in apology. Gavin did stop, though. “Those boots of yours look really nice now with blood all over the right one,” he joked. Gavin wasn't laughing or smiling, so Joel took a deep breath and put his hands down.

“Let's not forget there's still a pack of them down and around the corner, still banging on that door,” he told Gavin in a hushed tone. Gavin's snarl softened when something over Joel's shoulder caught his interest. Joel looked over as well to find more of them wandering aimlessly. The worst part, they were coming from the direction Joel had come from. Yep, definitely not making it back to his group by sundown.

“And I think I know which pack the one that attacked me belonged to,” Gavin spoke. Joel looked at him again and followed his gaze toward the other exit of the town. Four were slowly making their way toward them without knowing they were even there.

“God damn. This place is _littered_ ,” Joel mumbled. Gavin crouched down as he sneaked his way to the edge of the building. Joel pressed his back against the wall, hoping none would spot them out in the open like that.

“There's a liquor store over there,” Gavin said, pointing down the street, “Doesn't look boarded up.”

“But they might see us.”

“Not if we're quiet and duck behind the cars. It's only five of them there and that's easier to sneak past than the eight on the other side and the- _how ever many_ chased us, which looked _more_ than eight.”

“I guess.”

“You can stay here alone and figure out-”

“Shut up, Gavin. I'll go along with your plan,” Joel quickly crouched down and stayed behind Gavin as Gavin started making his way behind the first vehicle. Joel knew he couldn't complain. When he really looked at it, they had no other real option or route to take. They stayed low, keeping their sights glued on each walking monstrosity, and only exchanging glances when they were about to move to a new spot. With each move they made behind another vehicle or broken down sign, Joel felt his adrenaline rising, especially when one of them turned in their general direction. Somehow the liquor store seemed to look further and further away to him as well.

If one of them spotted the two, they wouldn't have trouble taking it out, but if one found them, the other four would notice, too. Their cries would draw more unwanted attention and the mere thought of it caused chills to run down Joel's back.

“Joel, come on,” Gavin's harsh whisper to him tore his gaze away from a particular creature with a face that looked almost as if it was bubbling. Bracing himself to hurry onto the next hiding spot, Joel sucked in the air sharply and went for it.

“Let's leg it,” Gavin told him right as he reached him. Joel widened his eyes and glanced up to where the door was. Okay, so it wasn't as far as he had feared. They _could_ make a quick run to it, though the idea of taking that kind of risk had his stomach turning.

“As soon as they turn away from us, we go,” Gavin went on to explain and Joel looked over his face for a second before staring over at the creatures like Gavin was.

“I can't believe I got myself wrapped up in this. This _never_ happens to anyone else when they go out,” he said under his breath. “Well, they never go alone, _that's_ why.”

“Do me a favor and wait to cry about it once we're safely inside.”

Joel squinted his eyes at Gavin and shook his head. “We don't know if anything's in there yet. We could be walking into an even _worse_ death trap.” Gavin huffed and returned the glare, but there was something more cruel to it than Joel's.

“Now,” Gavin told him and Joel watched as the lanky man took off on his left. Joel bit down on his lower lip as he checked to see if it was still okay to go. None of them were paying them any attention.

“I'm forcing Ellis with me next time,” he whispered while slightly getting up to begin his run. Gavin had already made it to the door and was quietly opening it. Joel saw him disappear inside and he came to a rough stop in front of the door. Gavin opened it for him and held it out enough for him to sneak in as well. With that part out of the way, they proceeded by using an empty nearby shelf to block the door.

“Oh, god,” Joel breathed, taking a step back. “We made it unharmed. We're alive.”

“ _Yay_ ,” Gavin sarcastically responded. Joel ignored the comment and went ahead to walk around the store for any sign of danger or supplies. Meanwhile, Gavin made his way to the other side of the store and slumped down to the floor. He brought his hands up and rubbed his face, fatigue catching up with him. He sighed softly and looked outside from a crack in the window. The sun was setting.

“Guess we'll be staying here for the night,” said Joel. Gavin wet his chapped lips a little with his tongue and shrugged.

“Doesn't bother me. Do you see anything we could eat?”

“We've got sunflower seeds, gum, a bag of beef jerky, and chocolate here by the counter,” Joel pointed at the stack in front. “If you want something to drink, help yourself. There's _plenty_ to drink.” He grabbed the sunflower seeds and the beef jerky before venturing over to where Gavin was sitting. Gavin silently took the the jerky he was offered and Joel threw off his backpack as he also sat down.

“Why the hell don't you have a backpack? Where do you hold your shit?”

“Ryan usually carries everything and I only carry around the things I really need when I'm out like this,” Gavin answered, patting his pockets and the inside of his jacket where Joel assumed he was keeping his gun. “And I didn't think I'd get hold up.”

“That's not my fault.”

“Wasn't blaming you, mate.”

Joel opened his mouth to add more to that, but he thought better of it and gestured toward the beef jerky Gavin was holding. “Open that bag up already so we can get something in our stomachs.”

* * *

 

“What do you see?”

Gavin carefully stepped off the steps he'd created using a few packs of beer and ran his fingers through his hair. “They don't seem to be leaving. I think they've made the area their new home,” he told Joel. It was officially dark out, aside from the small light the moon was providing.

“How the fuck are we going to leave tomorrow morning, then?”

“We'll search the back of this building. There must be an exit back there we could use- Joel, stop worrying,” Gavin had the urge to roll his eyes at the various expressions going through on Joel's face.

“I'm not!” Joel shot back, throwing his hands up.

“Whatever you say,” Gavin muttered. He pulled the little flashlight out from one of his jacket's pockets and turned it on to look at where he was about to sit before doing so. Joel sat across from him once more and watched how Gavin shined the light on his own face for a second as he turned it off. In that second, Joel got another good look of the scar Gavin had. That certainly wasn't there when they had met.

“Hey,” he spoke casually and Gavin lifted his head to meet his eye. Joel pointed to the spot on his own cheek that mirrored the scar on Gavin's, “What happened here?”

Gavin brushed his fingers against it, “Oh, this?” Joel nodded. “S'nothing. A couple of people tried to ambush us. I took one of them down, but they used their knife against me first.” Gavin moved his hand to his mouth to cover a yawn and Joel gave him a side smile.

“Get some sleep. I'll keep look out for a while.”

Without saying anything, Gavin got himself comfortable on the floor, using one of his arms as a pillow. Joel was surprised to see how easily the Brit fell asleep after his eyes had shut, so he made sure to be quiet whenever he moved around the store. He occupied his time by peeking out and wondering how nice it would be if he could shoot the ones he saw without too much noise occurring. He wandered back to the cash register to see if he might find any interesting things, and that's when he heard the soft whimpering. He froze from searching the pile of papers he found and listened.

“No...” It was Gavin. Joel straightened up and rushed over to where the Brit remained asleep. He bent down in front of him and placed a hand on his shoulder, ready to shake him awake.

“ _Mi-Michael!” He tried. Nothing. No... “_ MICHAEL _!” Silence. Gavin bent over, but he attempted as best as he could to hold it together. After spitting out a little, he rushed forward and climbed back up. It certainly was much easier falling down the damn thing than climbing it, but Gavin grabbed onto anything he could and ignored the need to rest. He had to see. He just had to see. Even if it meant the worst, at least he would know._

_His body trembled further the closer he got, though. Reaching the top, he pulled himself up, eyes shut tight and teeth clenched. And when he opened his eyes, his mouth fell open as he watched a man he didn't recognize fire his gun. The bullet went flying across the air and Gavin followed it until it made its contact with its target – the center of Michael's forehead._

Gavin jolted awake, instantly clutching Joel by the front of his sweater. Joel raised his eyebrows, but he gently rested his hands on Gavin's wrists.

“I was going to wake you,” he said. Gavin was breathing heavily and up this close, Joel could see the beats of sweat forming, making his bangs stick to his forehead. “Are you okay- well, I know you had a bad dream-”

“I'm fine,” Gavin cut him off, releasing Joel and yanking his wrists free. “I'm great... _bloody_ _fantastic_ ,” he was grumbling. Joel sat back to give Gavin his space, but he groaned.

“I barely know you at all, yet I try to be _nice_ ,” he scratched his head. “Does it _pain_ you to try?”

“Leave me alone, Joel,” Gavin spoke as he dug into one of the back pockets of his jeans.

“I will. After tomorrow morning, we'll go back to our lives and not have to see each other again. I'll be sure to tell Lindsay you said 'hi'.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah!”

“Well, be sure to also tell her that her _best_ _friend_ is _dead_ ,” Gavin's teeth were gritted as he pulled out a pair of necklaces with rough force that they jingled loudly against each other. Joel flinched when Gavin tossed them aside with that same force. The Brit jumped to his feet and stormed off to the other side of the store, managing to knock over a few things on his way there, bottles included.

Joel tightly shut his eyes as he listened to the glass shatter and _hoped_ nothing from outside heard. As silence fell upon them again, he let out his breath and crawled over to where the necklaces landed. He then looked toward the direction Gavin left in as he soundlessly said, “I'm sorry”.

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm thinking I should make a playlist for this. yeah??

It began with a gentle shake, but when he made no move in waking up, that gentle shake turned into a rough shove that had him opening his eyes wildly. Joel turned over to gape up at Gavin who was staring down at him, aggravated. Seeing it was merely him, Joel visibly relaxed, and then he shook his head at how rudely he'd been woken.

“It's morning and I want to leave,” Gavin practically spat at him before turning on his heel and heading for the back door. Joel was about to question why Gavin didn't just leave without him, but he thought better of it and hurried to get to his feet instead.

“Well, good morning to you, too, sunshine.”

“A group of them are still walking around out front,” Gavin explained, ignoring Joel's statement entirely, “Our only hope of getting out of here unharmed is through here,” he kicked open the door to reveal a small office. Joel joined him at his side seconds later, furrowing his eyebrows at the wild mess of scattered papers and blood stains on the rug in front of the door. Gavin was the first to take a step inside. He scanned the room carefully until he spotted what he was looking for – another door, the exit.

“There we go,” he told Joel, nodding toward the sign above the steel door at the left corner of the room. He quickly walked over to it while Joel took his time examining the papers on the floor.

News articles and what appeared to be torn out journal entries, but they all had something in common in which they all were discussing the disease that was spreading. Joel stopped to pick one of the entries up and though the handwriting seemed rushed and sloppy, he could make out most of the words. He read it himself: _Hey Lucielle, I know I haven't been home in a few days, but by the time you realize why, it'll be too late. I'm sick. I'm sick just like the others. I'm not going to get better. That's why I'm here. I'm waiting it out on my own. I hear people screaming outside all the time, but I've shut myself out of everything. I've closed shop. I think I heard you and your mother come by and I'm sorry if that was you and I didn't come outside. I can't let you see me get worse. You're only eight years old. But if you manage to get inside my office and read this, I want you to run._

_I want you and your mother to just leave, get as far away from the city as you can. I don't know if people are getting sick everywhere else, but I sure know it's not safe to stay here. I miss you baby girl. Stay strong and stay safe. Stay away from anyone who looks sick. Something happens to our minds after being sick like this for a while. We don't act the same anymore. I don't know why. I don't think anyone knows why yet. This is a new kind of sickness. I don't want to scare you, either. So just stay close to your mother at all times. I'm sorry I didn't get to say goodbye. And I'm sorry I wasn't there more. Please forgive me. - Dad_

Joel pursed his lips, his grip on the paper causing it to wrinkle even more than it already was. The sound of a body roughly hitting steel that was followed by a groan finally caused Joel to look up from the paper. He saw Gavin attempting to break open the door with his own strength.

“A bit of help wouldn't hurt,” the Brit bitterly commented, shooting a glare his way. Joel gently set the paper on the desk nearby and walked over to Gavin. Together, they kicked at the door and it slightly cracked open.

“Something on the other side is blocking it,” Joel mumbled.

“Gee, I didn't figure that out already.”

“I didn't really have anyone before this all happened,” Joel found himself saying as they went to kick the door again. Gavin raised an eyebrow questioningly at him and Joel sighed. “I wasn't in any relationship or had much family around,” he met Gavin's eyes and could tell Gavin was merely growing more baffled by the second. “I didn't really have anyone until now. My group... they're the only people I have,” he turned away and rubbed his face with his hands.

“It's always about _losing_ people or _worrying_ about losing someone. We _never_ have a break. We're just running and running, and for what? To _survive?_ Survive another day of running and starving, hoping you can find some food and supplies to get you through for a little while? This _isn't_ life. This isn't life anymore,” Joel paused to take a deep breath and collect his thoughts, though he didn't face Gavin. “When this started, they said we'd be fine, that we could get through this. A cure would be found and people would stop getting sick. But people who didn't even get into contact with sick people got sick. There was never hope,” now he turned to look at Gavin, eyebrows squeezed together in frustration. “What the hell are we doing?”

Gavin, who had just been staring at Joel with an emotionless look, shook his head. “I don't know,” he answered softly. Before Joel could find something else to say, Gavin gestured toward the door, “I think if we both push hard enough, we can push whatever is blocking it out of the way.”

Joel swallowed the lump forming in his throat. “Okay,” he walked back over and they proceeded to doing just that. Neither uttered a word to each other, but they did get what was blocking the door enough out of the way for one of them to get through. Gavin was the one to do so, squeezing through the small crack. Once he was outside, he hauled the dumpster aside as silently as possible. Joel walked out and closed the door behind him, half wishing he hadn't said anything at all, because he was unsure what had come over him. Although, he figured that wouldn't be a difficult task with Gavin who barely wanted to talk to him anyway. Speaking of the Brit, Joel turned around to face him and gaped to not find him there. He frantically looked both ways and spotted Gavin heading down the narrow alley they were now in. Before Joel could run after him, Gavin gave him the signal to stay put.

“I'm checking if the coast is clear first,” Gavin told him. Joel folded his arms across his chest and leaned against the door as he waited. He was feeling a little impatient and beyond ready to be back with his friends. He was looking forward to seeing Adam and pretending he was irritated with him for not offering to join him on this little supply run (which ended with him having _nothing_ to go back with). After he was done “yelling”, Adam would apologize and Joel would shut him up by pulling him into a tight embrace. Because Joel had only just realized how much that lovable man meant to him.

“We're safe, let's go,” Gavin called back to him. Joel's face brightened and he wasted no time in catching up with Gavin. They were near an entrance into a freeway that was littered with abandoned cars and who knew what else, but he didn't want to figure that out. Joel was going to turn away until he saw Gavin heading toward that entrance.

“Where the hell are you going?”

“My group is hiding out in a neighborhood at the other side of this god forbidden city, and I think this freeway has an exit that will lead to it,” Gavin explained.

“But you have to go through so many cars or... climb over a lot of them.”

“I'll take my chances with that than trying to sneak back over there. I ran into _plenty_ of those disgusting vermin on my way here because I went through the streets.”

“So, how the hell am I getting back to my group?” Joel asked as he looked over his shoulder. He had known the way back perfectly through the way he came from. He was certain if he walked in the different direction than Gavin, he would eventually recognize a few spots and know his way. “Well,” he sighed, turning back to Gavin, “I'm, uh, _glad_ we didn't die...”

Gavin blinked a few times. “Okay. Bye Joel,” and they were both ready to just go their separate ways, yet they stayed still for a moment and stared at each other. It was as if they were desperately searching for another thing to say, just for the sake of saying one more thing. It wasn't often that they ran into someone they recognized – someone friendly – instead of someone that wanted to kill them to steal what they had.

Even so, Joel merely gave Gavin a lopsided smile and Gavin nodded once at him. They turned around and walked away without another word.

 

* * *

 

After a long travel of crouching behind anything that could hide him, hoping none of _them_ would hear his breathing or hear his pattered footsteps as he ran over to a new spot, Joel finally approached the camp that held his group. The familiar surroundings lifted weight off his chest and he inhaled sharply as he marched on. Adam and Lindsay were the only ones around and when they spotted him, they stood up to greet him. He could see the relief in their eyes and exhaled slowly before letting a smile spread across his face. He matched that relief in their eyes – relief of making it back in one piece and from managing not to waste any of his bullets or weapons.

“We were getting worried,” Lindsay told him. “We agreed that if you weren't back by tonight, we'd go look for you.” Joel breathed a laugh.

“What happened?” Adam asked. Oh, Joel was definitely looking forward to “yelling” at him, but then he remembered something and cursed to himself as he halted in his tracks. Adam and Lindsay exchanged baffled looks, but they didn't ask.

Joel reached into his back pocket and pulled out the two necklaces Gavin had tossed aside. Lindsay instantly reacted at the sight of them. She widened her eyes and demanded to know where he got those. She then stepped forward and he stepped back, putting an arm up as a shield.

“Whoa, hey. I'll tell you, no problem! I was with Gavin all night, okay? We found ourselves surrounded, so we ran into the nearest store and stayed there until morning,” Joel glanced down at necklaces he held, “He told me that... Michael's... dead. I know he was your best friend,” he gave her a sympathetic look. “And I was going to give these back to Gavin after he threw them in anger, but it slipped my mind when we were sneaking out of the store-” That's when he noticed the many changes on Lindsay's face. She went from startled to a sort of realization, and then finally, devastation.

Joel's frown deepened. “I'm sorry, Lindsay,” he said in a hushed tone. Adam walked over to his side and placed a hand on his shoulder, giving a gentle squeeze.

Lindsay clasped her hands together and raised them up to her mouth. She turned away so they couldn't see her expression, but they could see the way she shook her head and they could hear her sigh. But they waited quietly for her to say something first.

“It had to be about two months ago,” she started. Joel and Adam raised their eyebrows as they listened. “During that night Meg, Chris, and I went out to try and hunt for our food. Remember?” The two nodded and Lindsay went on, “Okay, so of course we separated to cover more ground, and I heard a car in the distance. It sounded like it was going pretty fast so I stayed alert, but also tried to just ignore whoever it was. Then I heard someone running and they sounded out of breath. Again, I was going to ignore this, because whatever was going on, it wasn't my business. Except, I heard that person scream and yell for the ' _god damn disgusting piece of shit'_ to get off them, and I _knew_ that I knew that voice.

“It was _Michael._ It _had_ to be. So, I ran to look for him, and I barely made it in time to knock that god damn disgusting piece of shit of a monster away from him. We just stared at each other for a while before he grabbed me and held me tightly. And I could feel how _badly_ he was shaking. It was... oh, god, it was horrible. I asked him what was wrong and where everyone else was, but then that car got closer, _louder,_ and he ducked in fear. He told me he couldn't stay, that he had to keep going, and he promised me not to say anything to anyone about seeing him. I tried stopping him, though. I tried to convince him to come back here with me, but he just ran off and yelled back, 'Don't let them see you either!' and that was it...” Lindsay averted her eyes, though she did turn back around toward Adam and Joel. The ache she felt inside was so evident in her features – the way her eyebrows were squeezed together, her lower lip sticking out a bit, and her refusal to make eye contact.

“I don't know how long he's been away from Gavin, but I have a feeling that the reason Gavin thinks he's dead happened before I saw him that night,” she told them.

“So, you think Michael's possibly alive?” Joel was the one to ask.

“He was being chased and I wanted to go after him. I wanted to _help_ him, but that car... it started driving toward me, so I got out of the way and one of the people inside warned me to stay away. They said, 'Don't be stupid. You want him to live, don't you?' They drove off and I went to go find Meg and Chris,” Lindsay paused momentarily as she began to pace around the camp, “Look, I wanted to tell you guys,” she finally looked at them, eyes watering, “I did, but I-I didn't know what would happen if we did go after them and they found out. I didn't want them to hurt Michael, but you have no _fucking_ idea how much it's been killing me not to say anything. If Michael was eventually caught by them, it's on me. Because I could have _saved_ him. I could have helped, but I didn't do _shit_.”

“It's not your fault,” Adam spoke up and quickly held his hand up as he saw her attempt to protest, “ _Lindsay_ , it's _not_ your fault if something did happen to him.”

Lindsay took a deep breath and blinked a few times to try and hold back the tears threatening to escape. She then walked up to Joel and gently took the necklaces from him. “Yes, Joel. I do think he's possibly still alive,” she held the necklaces up by their chains and watched as the pendants dangled against each other, “And Gavin deserves to know that.”

“Did Gavin happen to mention where he was staying?” Adam asked as he turned to Joel. Joel nodded.

“Yeah, uh... actually, he did.”

“Okay, that's a start. We'll go and tell Gavin about this, then we'll offer to help look for Michael.”

Lindsay went over to where her backpack was lying and bent down to securely put the necklaces into one of its pockets. “Yes, this could work. We'll just let everyone else know when they get back.”

Joel's mouth fell open. He looked back and forth between the two of them, but they were serious about this. And he decided it was better not to comment on it how difficult it might be to find someone who was running for his life two months earlier. Instead, he swallowed hard and forced a smile on his face when Adam locked eyes with him.

“I'm mad at you.”

 

* * *

 

The sound of a door slamming shut caused Ryan to abruptly sit up from where he'd been napping on the couch. As a reflex, he reached for his rifle that was waiting for him on the coffee table and he was prepared to leap up onto his feet, but then he heard the person speak.

“It's just me,” Gavin said, walking past him and heading into the hallway. Ryan rolled his eyes, but he got up anyway.

“You were gone all night. What happened?” He called out to the Brit. Gavin shrugged.

“What always happens,” he answered so casually and gave Ryan no other chance to ask anymore questions. He opened the door on his left at the end of the hallway and disappeared inside.

Ryan crossed his arms and looked up as he saw Barbara rushing down the stairs.

“Who the hell was that?” She asked, panic fueled tone and face.

“Gavin's back,” he informed her. “He just headed into the garage.” At that, Barbara resumed running to go after Gavin while Ryan merely sighed as silence fell upon the house again. He ran a hand through his light colored hair and sat back down, almost sulking because of that damn silence. The silence was becoming such a regular and normal thing for them. Okay, it wasn't smart for them to be loud and make their presence within the house known to the outside, but they never used to be _this_ quiet. He even sometimes felt so distant from everyone, like they were all just strangers forced to be together.

He glanced to his left for a moment, but then he closed his eyes to pretend that empty spot next to him didn't taunt him as much as it did.

Barbara ran into the garage right as Gavin was done creating a new mark on the wooden board. She knew she had startled him from the way he flinched and almost dropped the screwdriver he was using. When he turned around, however, he wore the same blank look she dreaded to see.

“Hi,” she hardly whispered.

“What is it?” He questioned, setting the screwdriver down behind him. Barbara gestured toward the board and Gavin stiffened, his fingers curling until his hands were tight fists.

“One hundred and eighty-six days now,” she said. Gavin cocked his head to the side and just as she expected, he said nothing. “Gavin,” she sighed. “I know what that means, and don't act like I discovered your biggest secret ever. You're not exactly secretive about how you do that everywhere.”

“Okay then,” Gavin responded, the lack of emotion in his tone making Barbara frown.

“Gav,” she took a step forward and stopped because he narrowed his eyes at her. “I really hate seeing you like this, okay? We all do- _hey_ ,” this time she didn't hesitate to walk over to him when she saw him look away, shaking his head.

“I miss him, too,” she told him, “and-”

“What do you want me to say, Barbara?” Gavin interrupted. “Would you like me to cry? Is that what you want? Do you want me to _talk_ _about_ my feelings? Hmm?” His eyebrows shot up as he moved away from the wall to close the small gap between him and Barbara. “Well, if that's what you want, you won't get anything. I have _nothing_ to say.”

“Lately, you never do,” Barbara retorted.

“And I prefer it that way.”

“You can't just keep holding everything in, Gavin. Look at what it's doing to you!”

“I'm not holding anything in,” Gavin mumbled, scratching the back of his head. “I don't know what you're going on about.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yes.”

“So, Gavin, why do you still count down the days? Why is it still important to you to do that?” Barbara half wanted someone to barge in on them and stop their conversation for going any further than it already was. She knew she was pressing on more than was necessary, but she couldn't help it. She just needed to know Gavin really was okay. And if he wasn't, she needed to know what to do to help him.

“The answer to that is simple,” Gavin answered with one of his strained and cold smiles, another thing Barbara dreaded to see.

“What is it, then?” Barbara reluctantly asked as she began to fiddle with the ends of her sweater's sleeves.

Keeping that smile painted on his face, Gavin leaned in closer until he could whisper into her ear, “I'm keeping track of how many days I'm wasting being alive.” And Barbara wondered if it were physically possible for a heart to shatter, because she was certain that was what happened to her heart after hearing those words. She moved her head away slightly to get a better look at Gavin's face, her vision blurring by the second. The corners of Gavin's lips fell as he stared back at her.

“You know what frustrates me the most about it, Barbara?” She didn't audibly respond, but she did shake her head to let him know she was listening. Gavin took a peek back at the board before meeting Barbara's eyes again, “Is that he pushed me out of the way. He didn't even let me choose what I wanted to do. Maybe I _wanted_ to die right there with him-”

“Gavin, stop-”

“-but he chose to leave me. I didn't _ask_ him to _save_ me,” Gavin finished, his teeth clenched. Barbara sputtered, looking anywhere but at him. Of course that's what Michael did. She had heard the story the day it happened, and though it hurt to hear, she understood perfectly why he did it. That was just the kind of person Michael Jones was. But it was also what any of them would do for each other.

And she wanted to tell Gavin that. She wanted to say, “You would have done the same”, but somehow she knew he would only argue with her about it.

“I'm sorry,” she mouthed to him instead, because she couldn't bring herself to get anything else out. Gavin scoffed and moved around her to make his way to the door. She didn't stop him.

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have created [the playlist!!](http://8tracks.com/heytheregisela/it-s-not-over-yet-mavin) Songs that have applied so far are the first 5 in the playlist. The songs for this chapter are “A While” by Gabrielle Aplin and “Torch Song” by Shady Bard.
> 
> ALSO, check out [this amazing art of Gavin](http://mogarsjones.tumblr.com/post/130214933838/justisaisfine-final-result-of-the-art-i-used) [justisaisfine](http://justisaisfine.tumblr.com/post/130175513732) did for this fic :D

Joe the Cat was normally found hanging around Miles, because technically he was Miles' cat. However, Miles had forgotten to let the poor cat into his bedroom that night. So, while Gavin was heading up to his own room, he found the cat lying next to the staircase at the top. Gavin walked right past him, but he purposely left his door open for a few moments, and Joe happily allowed himself in. Once the door was closed for the night, Gavin dragged his feet toward the small bed and fell face forward onto it. His entire body was aching and his eyes seemed to burn with the urge for some rest. He wouldn't deny it, he felt this way throughout each day. Even when he was up and moving around everywhere with plenty of what appeared to be energy. It wasn't until he was actually lying down that it all hit him, and it hit him hard.

A few hours of sleep every night wasn't doing him any justice. It was the best he could manage, though, and that was better than nothing at all. If he allowed himself anymore hours, he would fall deeper into nightmares that made him sick to his stomach to think and dwell over when he was awake. He rolled over onto his back and turned his head to stare out the window. It was boarded up, work of the previous person or people that had stayed in the house. Gavin could still see glimpses of the night sky through the cracks. There was a gentle dip in the bed as Joe the Cat jumped onto it and made his way toward Gavin. The orange tabby had decided Gavin's chest was the ideal spot for him to plop himself down on and sleep, and Gavin couldn't complain. In fact, Gavin encouraged it by comforting the cat with scratching behind his ears.

But he himself was so tired.

His eyelids were heavy enough to easily droop shut and he was prepared to give in, but the hollow hole inside him grew as he went over the events with Joel. He reached his hands down to pat his pockets. Empty. And maybe it was stupid, but he also patted around his neck for the familiar feeling of a chain. Nothing. Despite his heart throbbing painfully underneath where the cat slept, Gavin breathed out a joyless laugh and shook his head.

No... he was fine. He was _completely_ fine.

 

* * *

 

“You're saying you want us to get up, leave our little place here, go find the other group and _help_ them look for someone whose possibly dead?” Burnie asked, staring directly at Lindsay and Adam, because Joel was rubbing his neck and looking elsewhere. As soon as everyone was back together, Lindsay stood up and made the announcement of what she wanted them to. She told them the whole story with Joel occasionally adding in details of his night spent with Gavin and for a long while, none of the others said anything.

Adam then talked about why this could be a good thing for them to do, and that it wouldn't hurt to meet up with old familiar faces. Maybe this time they would stay together, build up something – like a community. It sounded beautiful in words, but no one appeared to be too impressed with going through with it.

“Burnie, don't make it seem like it's the _worst_ thing. If we work fast, we could find them, and then we'll all be working together,” Lindsay urged.

“But what if Michael is... you know,” Chris averted his eyes, “not alive?” Lindsay squinted her eyes at him.

“I had the same thought,” Joel spoke up and he pretended he didn't notice Lindsay now gaping at him, “but now I'm thinking, well, it wouldn't kill us to try finding out.” At that, Lindsay's face brightened and Joel almost laughed at the quick change that was.

“It might,” Ashley whispered.

“I mean...” Burnie sighed, scratching his head. “I'm sorry, Linds, about what happened that night when you saw Michael, but it's been a long time. Where would we even _start_ to look for him?” Lindsay slumped her shoulders, because if she was being honest, she had absolutely no clue. If Michael were alive, he could anywhere. He could be across the country for all she knew. They were going to be blindly searching, which was the least smartest thing to do. Okay, the plan evidently needed more polishing, and much more time. Although, time was something they definitely did not have.

“Hey,” she heard a soft voice say. She looked to her right to find Meg standing next to her. God, she hadn't even heard Meg approach her. Meg offered a small smile as she placed a hand on her shoulder, “This is a nice thing you want to do, and after what he did for me, I would gladly help, but...” she trailed off. Lindsay already knew where she was heading with that. Yet, there had to be something they could still try.

Lindsay faced the rest of her friends again and hesitated just a second, especially with having to see the discomfort in their expressions, before asking, “Can we at least go to Gavin and let him know? I feel like I owe him at least that.”

The corners of Chris' lips rose slightly. “I don't think any of us would have a problem with that,” he said. Burnie and Ashley nodded in agreement.

 

* * *

 

“Is it time already?”

Ryan paused momentarily from stuffing his backpack of a few of the new things they had found, and he looked over at Jack. Jack was standing in the archway of the living room, arms crossed, but he wore his usual warm expression. Ryan's lips twitched into an attempt for a smile as he nodded.

“I figure we should head out to somewhere new. Just keep going until we find something actually worthwhile. You stay at one place for too long and you become too comfortable, too vulnerable.”

“I agree,” though Jack's eyes said the opposite, he wouldn't admit to that out loud. He simply headed over to Ryan's side and began assisting him in gathering everything together.

“Aw, moving day already?” Another voice chimed in, the disappointment perfectly laced into their tone.

Ryan sighed deeply. “Yes, Miles. Already.”

“Well, what are we doing next?” Arryn called from the kitchen where she had wandered into for a new water bottle. Ryan had literally just finished explaining it to Jack. Jack understood, because he answered for Ryan.

“What we always do,” he told Arryn, “And hey, will one of you go tell the others that we're leaving?”

“On it,” Miles nodded at him before hurrying back up the stairs.

Ryan resumed looking through his backpack to make sure he had most of what he needed and wanted in there. He wouldn't dare tell anyone else, but he'd been up before the sun, and he had spent his time walking around and grabbing any necessity he could find. He then sat down for a while, letting himself get lost within his own horrid thoughts before standing up and going through the house again in case he missed something. By now, he was certain they had everything they would want and need, yet he kept checking. Perhaps it wasn't the best distraction and somewhat a waste of time when he knew they had all things in order, but it worked. So, he continued going on repeat.

It wasn't until he saw Miles returning to the living room with Joe cradled in his arms and everyone else except Gavin following behind that Ryan stopped what he was doing and scowled. Although most of them normally despised how much they moved around now, they knew it was what needed to be done. Therefore, they were always prepared. Barbara, Aaron, and Miles already had their things packed and were currently carrying said things with them into the living room. But Gavin... Gavin wasn't like them. He was good at getting things finished first and fast, but he had his times were he would purposely act a specific way because he didn't care if it bothered anyone else or not.

“Where the hell's Gavin?” He asked Miles, hoping he didn't sound too irritated.

“Well, I went into his room and found him cuddling with Joe. Uh, I told him to hurry and get up, because we're leaving, and he just ignored me,” Miles answered. Ryan rolled his eyes. That was exactly what he suspected. Miles flashed him an apologetic smile. What was he apologizing for – for Gavin?

Oh, everyone was sure to walk on eggshells around Gavin. Ryan did as well, though, because he still went back to the evening of Michael's death and still shuddered at the memory. He often remembered how Gavin returned, panting from running a far distance. He had been the one to go up to Gavin and grab him by the shoulders to ask him why he was alone. And he could never forget the way Gavin looked him in the eyes, color drained from his face and sweat rushing down the sides of it. The words Gavin had uttered still rang through his head, and it was merely due to _how_ Gavin had said it – defeated and hoarse, “They killed him.”

Ryan was losing his patience at this point, though. He just wanted them all to go _now_ and get somewhere new before night fall, and Gavin was making that impossible. Something _so_ simple was turning so difficult.

“You want me to go drag him out of there?” Miles offered.

“No, I'll do it,” Ryan grumbled, rushing past him and Barbara and ignoring their eyes widening. Ryan used the time spent walking up the steps and then down the hall toward Gavin's room to rehearse the exact words he was going to say to him, but once he got there, the words were forgotten. His eyebrows squeezed together at the sight he saw; Gavin was curled up in a fetal position, his back toward Ryan, and Ryan looked up at the ceiling as if to ask “Why?”

“Gavin,” he began, purposely drawling out his name. There a long sigh before Gavin rolled over to face him. “We're leaving. Get your stuff and let's go.”

Not a word in protest, or hardly a sound. Gavin merely pulled himself to sit upright and rubbed his eyes with the backs of his hands until he finally threw his legs over the edge of the bed and stood. Ryan would have left then, but he was in awe of the simplicity that had been. He had expected a fight, to have to _literally_ drag Gavin off the bed and pack his things for him if it meant getting them all out of the house before noon in one piece. But Gavin wasn't fighting it. He wasn't saying anything. And Ryan wasn't sure what to think.

“Miles told me he came to get you and you just ignored him,” because that was the only thing Ryan figured he should mention. Gavin was picking up a few of his things from off the floor and glanced at Ryan.

“I heard him,” he said. Ryan huffed. His annoyance was returning and it was thanks to Gavin's little attitude. The Brit could honestly make anything sound offending without trying.

“Then why weren't you getting ready yet?” Ryan questioned, walking further into the room.

“I was going to eventually,” Gavin murmured as he headed over to the closet. Ryan felt his eye twitch, but he remained silent a moment to watch Gavin pull out two backpacks he hadn't seen in so long.

He knew who those had belonged to, yet he asked, “Why do you have two? You don't even use them.”

“I plan on using one of them now. I guess it would come in handy to carry it around everywhere,” Gavin refused to make eye contact with Ryan as he proceeded to putting his own things in one of the backpacks. He emptied out the second one to fill the first with its things and Ryan frowned.

“I, uh, didn't think you still had those, actually.”

Gavin looked as though he was ready to toss the empty one aside, but he pursed his lips and handed it to Ryan instead. “Do you think you could use another?” Ryan waved him off and was going to turn to leave, except he now had one of the questions he'd originally rehearsed to ask playing through his mind once again.

He turned back to Gavin and took a deep breath. “You do realize how you've been acting, right?”

“Oh, have you been talking to Barbara?” Gavin immediately shot back. He even ended up tossing that empty backpack out of his way to emphasize his irritation building up. If it was supposed to make Ryan want to leave, it didn't work.

Gavin spun around and Ryan quickly blocked his way. The man stood firm in front of the doorway, arms spread out and eyes narrowed. Gavin scoffed.

“Move.”

“I'm just going to tell you this one time, so you better listen carefully-”

“-oh, great.”

Ryan stepped closer so that he was practically nose to nose with Gavin. Well, he certainly would have been if they were the same height. Gavin wasn't about to let their height difference intimidate him, so he lifted his chin and set his lips into a straight line as he stared hard into Ryan's eyes.

“You,” Ryan pressed a finger against Gavin's chest and Gavin's demeanor faltered for a mere moment that it could have easily gone unnoticed. Ryan noticed. “You are _not_ the only person here who's gone or _is_ going through a rough time, so stop acting like it's only you, and _stop_ acting like being angry all the time is going to change anything. Believe me, it _won't._ When you finally realize that, you'll be able to tolerate life again. Seriously,” Ryan put his finger down and slowly moved backward, “You'll feel so much better once you stop letting that anger take over.” He turned around, making it halfway down the hallway before something else he wanted to say came to mind.

“Just...” he looked at Gavin over his shoulder, mentally apologizing to him, but it needed to be said anyway. Though he said it as gentle as possible, “Get over yourself.” And for the first time in too long, Ryan saw Gavin show a different emotion other than boredom or frustration.

Gavin had been _offended_ by those words, and he looked genuinely confused as to why it offended him. Ryan simply walked off. Gavin soon followed. And neither uttered another word to each other that day.

 


	5. Chapter 5

“Look up ahead at that billboard,” Miles called out to the rest of the group, and once everyone was looking over at him, he pointed. Sure enough, there was a billboard in their clear view with its past advertisement sloppily ripped off and replaced with black painted words: DANGER BEYOND THIS POINT. GO BACK.

Ryan completely halted in his tracks and let out a quiet sigh of disappointment, and everyone else practically did the same. Miles scratched his head and looked at them over his shoulder.

“That could mean anything, though,” he muttered under his breath.

“I think it's pretty obvious what it means, Miles,” Barbara told him, folding her arms across her chest. Arryn nodded.

“The area is littered with infected and if we're smart, we'd listen to that and just head a different way,” she said.

“I guess it's a good thing we noticed that billboard now before we ended up wandering over there and getting trapped,” Aaron added, looking around at the others. Gavin groaned and Aaron turned his attention right on him.

Gavin met his eye and shrugged, “Yeah, yeah. You're right.” Aaron opened his mouth to say something more to that, but Jack held his hand up to stop him, and it worked. This wasn't the time.

“So, what now?” Barbara questioned, specifically Ryan since it was his idea to head toward Nashville. The idea had lingered in Ryan's mind when they had still been in Texas months back and saw signs scattered everywhere outside of Dallas about Nashville still being filled with anything anyone would need. Of course it was hardly a possibility that enough supplies would be left, but they had decided to go for it anyway after Ryan talked them into it. _Until_ now.

Ryan had nothing to say. Gavin rolled his eyes and stepped forward to stand on top of the car Miles was currently looking at the city on. From what they had seen so far of Tennessee, they certainly could see what a sight a few of the parts had once been. A few neighborhoods and streets in particular cities had gone through terrible fires when hell first broke loose. Fires had been attempts at ridding the area of its infected, and though it did do the job, it left little to live in afterward. Why anyone ever thought _that_ would be the solution was beyond the people now, but the damage had been and it was too late to fix it. Buildings were all crumbled to the ground, and others were slowly waiting their turn, just waiting for a person to wander within them and step on that thin line that was barely keeping them up.

Closer to Nashville, however, the only evident damages were how abandoned everything appeared. Rows and rows of different vehicles left behind on the interstate 65, and moss growing anywhere it was allowed. Besides the billboard's warning, they'd seen worse in cities as they approached that would immediately get them to turn around. Nashville did not look like one of those cities, though, and it was why Gavin felt the urge to go through with their original plan.

“I could bet whoever wrote that warning wanted people to purposely stay away,” he began, running his fingers through his hair, “That way they could keep everything for themselves.”

“And what if it's a real warning?” Arryn asked him. Gavin turned to look down at her, head cocked to the side.

“S'nothing we can't handle, because you-” he jumped off the car and walked up to her, “you know how to use that hammer of yours to your great advantage, and you now know your way perfectly around a hunting rifle.” Arryn followed him as he talked while circling around her, but before she could get her response in, he moved onto doing the same to Jack.

“You sneak around well and can really _strangle_ anyone or _anything_ to death if need be,” Gavin informed him. Jack sighed and Gavin stepped up to Aaron and Barbara.

“Save your breath, Gavin; I know what I'm capable of,” Barbara declared, waving him off. Gavin turned on his heel to face Ryan and was only slightly taken aback from the way Ryan was staring at him. As if he were a stray cat and Ryan was the family dog that was not pleased by this small stranger on their property.

“We can do this, Ryan,” Gavin spoke calmly, raising his eyebrows. “We can keep going and check it out. I know we have nothing else to do, but find a place to stay. Why waste our times doing that when we can investigate what's going on here? We might get what we came here for. _Or_ -” he narrowed his eyes, “-we can do as the billboard says and waste a good opportunity at snagging supplies we desperately need.”

Ryan's lips curled up, but that cold glint in his eyes was still very evident.

“The worst that's out there is a bunch of knobs who think they can own the entire place,” Gavin then added when Ryan took too long to reply. Ryan's smile widened.

“Well, it's not just up to you and me,” he said. He turned toward everyone else, studying their uneasy expressions, and he threw his hands up. “What do you say?”

 

* * *

 

> _Four days earlier._

Lindsay ripped off the paper from the door, fighting the urge to crumble it up in anger right then and there. Meg was the first to notice between her and Chris, and she hurried to Lindsay's side to take the paper from her and read it herself.

“Don't bother,” she read out loud, furrowing her eyebrows before looking up at the house they were standing in front of. Lindsay huffed and turned to face her.

“From the many times Carter made Aaron be the one to make lists of things, I recognize his handwriting well, and _that's_ his,” she pointed out, her tone almost whiny, “which means, they're _gone_. We found their place, but I guess it's not their place anymore! We're _too_ late!”

“Linds, they couldn't have been gone too long. Joel was _just_ with Gavin _yesterday_ morning! Wherever they are, they can't be that far. They probably left last night or earlier today.”

“Yeah, but that still leaves the problem of _where_ they went next – which direction they headed in. We have _no_ idea about that!”

“We might,” she heard Chris yell from across the street where he'd been searching around. It was how she realized how loud she must have been for Chris to have heard everything. She and Meg looked over at him as he ran to show them what he found. The closer he got, the more Lindsay could tell it was a map, and she _gently_ took it from him when he handed it to her.

“It's a map of Tennessee and Nashville is marked,” he told them. “I know we can't be sure that was even _their_ map, but they could have headed that way. That is where we thought about going next back then after we got away from Carter's guys. Maybe they had the same idea now.”

“What if they're not there, though?” Lindsay practically asked that underneath her breath, but Meg and Chris didn't miss it.

“This isn't what you want to hear, and believe me, I hate saying it, but if they're not there, then at least we can say we tried,” Meg told her, voice soft. “And then we can do what we wanted to do in Nashville a long time ago. Although, there's no guarantee that there's anything left there for us, I'm still willing to go for it.”

“I don't know how everyone else is going to feel about this plan,” Chris reminded them. “Yes, we wanted to get to Nashville back then, but I don't think they're into that idea anymore, especially after so much time has passed.”

“Well, we're not just going to stick around anywhere near here, either. Might as well keep going and if we really... don't find them, we'll probably get something out of it anyway,” Lindsay said. Meg reached her hand down to interlock her fingers with Lindsay's, giving her hand a squeeze, because the defeat in those last words was everything that broke her heart.

“Come on, let’s go tell them,” she whispered, and Lindsay nodded.

 

* * *

 

> _Present._

Gavin had been right, and Ryan wasn't sure whether to hate or love him for it. Either way, they found themselves holed up in a run-down apartment complex and on the highest floor they could reach without falling over or utterly cutting themselves on broken shards of glass from shattered windows from the hotel next door. It was one of the only decent rooms within the building that wasn't filled with anything they didn't want to see and it was actually holding up well, despite its surrounding slowly breaking apart. The apartment also had a window that led to the perfect view of who they were up against – a group of people, various ages except for children, patrolling the city. They were specifically guarding a school, or what used to be a school, across the street from the complex. These people had chosen the school as their main point, for whatever reason, and they managed to successfully turn the place into an unwelcoming prison.

Down in the first floor, they were close to having a run in with a few of those people from across the street who had decided to check the complex and the hotel for any uninvited guests. Barbara stayed behind a little to create distractions while the others ran their way up the first flight of stairs to the second floor. Barbara got away from the men when she grabbed a small, cracked vase and tossed it beautifully at one of their heads. So while the man groaned in pain, hand clutching the back of his bleeding head, his friends all ran over to see what the matter was. Barbara took the opportunity to her advantaged and crawled away from her hiding spot until she was able to jump up and run up the stairs without being spotted.

Of course this meant the men now _knew_ people, or at least someone, was in the building with them, yet the group didn't let that scare them. While they made their climb to higher floors, they stopped for a few to listen in.

“Did you find anything?” One asked, not too far from where they were currently crouched down inside a filthy apartment with year old rotten bodies of people who had taken their lives the second they knew they were doomed (if the guns in their hands were any indication). Gavin kept making scrunched up faces and his eyes watered every time he covered his mouth to resist gagging. Instead of scolding him to keep it together, his friends were actually relieved to see that at least one thing about him hadn't changed. But they still kind of wanted to scold him, because he wasn't the only one having trouble dealing with the smell. It was that kind of smell that was just impossible to grow used to, no matter the numerous times they had smelled it before.

“No, nothing,” the second man responded, sounding a little too close that Ryan quickly signaled for the others to get prepared, “It doesn't look like anyone was here.”

“Then how the fuck do you explain me getting hit in the head with a _god_ _damn_ vase?!”

“I'm not sayin' there definitely ain't someone here with us; I'm just sayin', they're good at hiding, but we'll find 'em. Don't worry.”

“Alright,” the first man drawled out. “I'll go up higher. You just... keep looking through this floor.”

Footsteps passed right by the room they were hiding in, and for a moment, they were each holding their breaths in anticipation of the door swinging open. Nothing happened though. They released their breaths in unison.

“There's still one more guy on the floor with us,” Ryan reminded them, “We have to quietly take care of him and move on.”

“Wasn't there a third guy?” Jack asked, looking around at everyone.

“I think he ran out to let his friends outside know what's going on,” Barbara answered.

Ryan slowly got to his feet and walked up to the door, but as he grabbed the doorknob, he said, “Whatever happens after I open this door, just remember to _run_.”

They would have gotten away without being seen by the man on the same floor as them, except that Miles and Gavin had tripped over each other from running at the same speed, dangerously close to one another. And the man heard, returning from the corner he had left in.

“Oh, _there you are_ ,” he sounded so proud.

“Go, Miles,” Gavin instructed him, shoving him away and hoping he would get up quickly. Miles shook his head, though.

“What, I'm not going to let you deal with him on your own. He's got a shotgun.”

“That's right, I do, and I can't wait to see your pretty heads blown off.”

Miles shut his eyes, bracing himself, but he ended up opening them wide when he heard Gavin frantically yell, “Ryan, _don't_!” Miles raised an eyebrow and attempted to look behind the man for any sign of Ryan. No one was there, yet the man had been fooled and turned around to look. And Miles understood Gavin's little stunt as Gavin leaped to his feet and ran forward, tackling the man. The man grabbed hold of the top of Gavin's hair with one hand while his other hand wrapped around Gavin's neck. Gavin was straddling him, though, so he had nowhere to go but fight his way out from underneath. Gavin clenched his teeth as his own hands curled into tight fists that he then tried swinging at the man's face. While they remained in that position, Miles stood up, clutching his bow and reaching back for an arrow. He latched the arrow on and aimed directly at the man's head before releasing. The arrow was just a hair away from striking Gavin's ear on its way to its destination, but Gavin had ducked away in time, and he heard the stranger inhale his last breath before he saw his head fall back with a satisfying _thud!_

Miles breathed out a laugh, his shoulders slumping in relief. Gavin grabbed the arrow still rammed into the dead man's forehead and yanked it free before standing and heading over to Miles.

“Good shot,” he murmured, slamming the arrow on its side against Miles' stomach. Miles couldn't even be annoyed by the action, because of all the months he spent trying to perfect his aim with that damn bow, and he had never been as successful with a kill as he had been now. He wiped the blood from the arrow's tip on his jeans and placed it back with the others as he turned to follow Gavin.

The two eventually caught back up with the rest of their group and were able to see Jack do as Gavin said he could – strangle a person to death. With that man down, they knew they were safe the rest of the way up. And when they made it the room with the perfect view of the library, they silently cheered to themselves for still being alive. It could have been worse, that was for certain. It was almost nothing compared to other crap they found themselves in before.

But now their problem was... figuring out how the hell to get past the area without getting caught. Of course they could always sneak in through the hotel next door and make their way out through the right side, but there was no doubt there were people over there too. From the looks of it, the entire area was surrounded. It was a wonder how they were able to get past fast enough to get inside the complex. Although, they did have one too many close calls when a particular woman kept glancing over her shoulder when they were jumping in through an open window one by one.

They were safe, for a while, so they decided on resting while they came up with plans on how to get away. The apartment they were momentarily residing in consisted of three rooms – one ransacked bedroom with a mere king sized bed, a small living room that looked to be flipped upside down (especially its torn apart loveseat), a kitchen with its cabinets wide open and mostly cleaned out, and a bathroom where Arryn found some bandages that would be useful to them. They all, but Ryan and Gavin, remained together in the living room. Aaron and Barbara were scoping out the area from the window, checking to see exactly where every one of those people were. When the sun started setting, they were amazed to find the school was lit up inside. Ah, so they had power. Barbara used the light to her advantage by following the shadows on walls of people walking around in classrooms in different sections of the school. She counted how many people she saw in each room to see how many they were up against while Aaron searched for flaws around front that they could sneak past.

Jack and Arryn were standing near the door, making sure they heard nothing suspicious outside, but they were ready in case they did. Miles was making use of anything he could find, and Gavin and Ryan were just sitting next to the window in the bedroom. The two would occasionally look out to see if they saw anything dangerous. After a while, though, they gave up on checking. Nothing much was even going on out there. They were honestly surprised the people weren't trying harder to find them, but they weren't complaining. Perhaps they figured their threat was gone, or they knew they were still inside the complex and were waiting to strike, which wasn't a comforting thought. That could mean the building was now guarded from each exit.

Gavin shook his head, deciding not to think about it any further. They would figure something out in the morning. They always did. He looked to his right where the few bottles of whiskey he took from the kitchen were. One was half empty while the other was brand new – or as new as they could be considered now. He picked up the half empty bottle first and he could see Ryan staring at him curiously from his peripheral vision as he opened it. Gavin took a swig of the liquid before setting the bottle down slightly and offering it to Ryan. Ryan narrowed his eyes and shook his head.

Gavin snorted and brought the bottle back up to his lips. “Oh, right. You're just like Ray,” but as he was going in for another sip, he realized what he had said. “Bollocks,” he mouthed, meeting Ryan's eye.

Ryan was glaring at him for a minute until his expression drastically softened. “Just... shut up,” he said. Gavin was keen on doing so, and they did sit in a silence for a long time before Ryan unexpectedly spoke up again. “You know, there was a lot about Ray that surprised me.”

Gavin had a mouth full of whiskey that he was supposed to chug down, but upon hearing Ryan, he paused swallowing to listen clearly. He swallowed roughly, painfully, and licked his lips, unsure if he wanted to hear this. He was not even minding the quiet atmosphere that was starting up between them. He liked the quiet. It was peaceful. He didn’t know what to feel about Ryan talking about Ray, because he knew Ray was a sensitive spot for Ryan. This conversation was going to lead somewhere Gavin dreaded it to go. He chugged more of the amber liquor to prepare himself.

“He looked so scared all the time when I first met him,” Ryan went on, “I kept thinking, ‘How did he make it this far?’, but then he proved me wrong. It was not too long before we met _you_ that he… he saved my life. He was determined to go into this house alone and no one was volunteering to join him, so I did, because I still didn’t believe he could handle anything by himself. He was just a kid – well, he just looked like one,” Ryan paused to snicker, “He loved to remind me then that he was twenty-five and that our age differences weren’t at all that different. Uh, anyway, so we went in together and I told him to stay close when we started going down the hallway. He made a joke about holding my hand and I turned around to make a comeback when he yelled at me to duck.

“So I did, without hesitation, and I heard a gunshot and a cut off scream of agony from behind me before I finally looked over my shoulder and saw that someone was trying to come up and axe me in the head. And I know what you’re thinking; that wasn’t that impressive of a save from Ray, because all he did was tell me to duck and then shot the person dead, but it was the _way_ he did it that caught my attention. He… he knew what he had to do and he did it without batting his eye or running off.  

“He stood still and calmly took his shot. And this was during when all of _this_ , this _life_ , was still pretty new and everyone was still adjusting, and having to kill wasn’t as normal as it is now. I had seen people freeze up after or _before_ killing someone, but Ray… no, he was set on saving me and didn’t care what that meant for the other person. So I saw, that day, that he was a _lot_ tougher than I gave him credit for. Although, when I stood up and thanked him, he flashed me this crooked, wide grin and I almost couldn’t believe that was the same guy who had just successfully shot someone in the head without a miss,” Ryan laughed again, softer this time, but his face fell entirely as something else crossed his mind.

“For a while, I had trouble sleeping, because he wasn’t there. I was so used to have him next to me at night that without him, everything felt colder, and just… not right. It’s _still_ not right, if I’m being honest- and you know, you can drink that a little slower. No one’s going to take it from you,” he scolded Gavin as he heard a particularly loud gulp from him.

Gavin allowed the now empty glass to roll out of his hand and under the bed in front of them before reaching for the next bottle.

“I think you’ve had enough,” Ryan told him.

“It’s been a long time, Ryan. A _very_ long time,” Gavin slurred, fumbling with getting the new bottle open.

“Gavin-“

“I want this, Ryan. I want to forget everything for a while. This…” he held up the bottle, “this will help.”

“Oh, don’t give me that _bullshit_ , Gavin-“

“I _will_ give you that _bullshit_ , Ryan, because I’m tired, and we’re not _doing_ anything right now anyway.”

Ryan pursed his lips, thinking of the many other things he could say at the moment, but he chose not to argue anymore. It wasn’t worth it. “Fine, go ahead. Get yourself drunk to the point of blacking out. I won’t be here to help you get up in the morning.”

“It’s a good thing I’m not asking for your help, then, isn’t it?”

“We were almost having a good time, Gavin.”

Gavin grinned at him, but as usual, it lacked any sort of real emotion, and it looked heavily forced. Like he was just grinning just to do it. Ryan sighed deeply and looked forward instead of the mess increasing next to him. He kept focusing on anything that seemed mildly interesting and ended up creating a story of what happened in this apartment before they got there. Had it only been one person who lived there? Or two? Did one of those people include a child, or were they both adults? Had there been a dog?

Ryan decided there hadn’t been a dog, just for the sake of not having to imagine a possible terrible outcome for the animal. He played a story through his mind of people who might have lived there, and his eyelids began growing heavier and heavier. He would be able to sleep the night away soon, and then he would wake up, and they would all move on from the place. They would get away and get what they need, and they would be okay for a few weeks. Yes, that sounded nice.

With that thought in mind, he started to drift off until he heard Gavin groan. He opened one eye to look at the Brit, and then opened his other eye when he saw Gavin was staring right at him.

“What?” He asked, though he expected an incoherent answer or no answer at all, because Gavin was in a much worse state and that bottle in his hand was had much less liquid than before. Ryan snatched it away from him and Gavin didn’t complain. In fact, Gavin just scooted closer to Ryan despite Ryan telling him to keep his head away from the window’s view. 

Gavin blinked hard, somehow thinking that was going to clear his vision, and it did for a minute, but he was far too gone to see correctly. Once they were just inches apart, he lifted his hand and lazily placed it on Ryan’s cheek. Ryan stiffened and grabbed onto Gavin’s wrist to pull his hand away, but he halted his movements and widened his eyes upon hearing what Gavin said.

“I love you, _Michael_ ,” Ryan furrowed his eyebrows at how horribly Gavin pronounced the name in his drunken state. Then, as Gavin leaned in closer, Ryan leaned back, gaping.

“Gavin, I’m not Michael,” he tentatively said. Gavin tilted his head slightly, because even though part of him knew that was Ryan talking, he could still see those brown eyes that were basically the same shade as the whiskey he’d been drinking. He could see the splattered freckles on soft, pale skin. And he saw the auburn curls wildly sticking up in certain places.

But Ryan was right. He wasn’t Michael. Gavin was only seeing what he wanted to see, what his clouded mind made him see. He dropped his hand from Ryan’s cheek and inhaled shakily.

“Ryan,” Gavin stated blandly after a moment.

“Yeah?” Ryan asked.

“Where’s _Mi-chael_?”

Ryan frowned, shaking his head, but then he looked over at the bed and stood up. “Come on, it’s time for you to sleep.” He held out his hand for Gavin to grab, and of course, Gavin ignored him. He had to crouch down and gently pick the lanky man up to his feet. Gavin threw his arms around Ryan for support as they walked over to the bed. Once there, Ryan carefully helped him lie down, and there was a bit of a struggle with entangling Gavin’s arms from his neck, but he managed.

“Okay, now… go to sleep. We’re going to have a long day tomorrow,” he turned away to leave the bedroom and see what the others were up to, but Gavin was talking again, and he stopped to listen.

“You loved Ray,” with how slurred and quiet the words came out, Ryan shouldn’t have understood, but he had.

And he smiled, a genuine kind of smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes, but it was definitely sweeter than any smile he’d done lately. “No,” he said back, glancing at Gavin over his shoulder, “I still do.” And he closed the door behind him on his way out.

Gavin’s eyes slowly fluttered shut; the image of a dimpled smile luring him to sleep. It wasn’t the best sleep, yet it was the first time since he last saw Michael that he wasn’t interrupted by any nightmare.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I ended up splitting this chapter up, so there's no song for this chapter. Anyway, enjoy!

Ryan was vaguely amazed with how Gavin handled everything the next morning. He didn’t feel well, that much was expected, but he also didn’t recall much from the night before, and Ryan figured that was for the best. Gavin kept himself inside the bedroom for a while until he felt stable enough to get up without his head throbbing with every step. Meanwhile, everyone else was gearing up and preparing to put their plan into action. Miles took note of the way Gavin was groaning softly as he walked by, but he received a warning look from Ryan, and decided not to question anything.

Arryn was back in the bathroom, looking through every inch in case she had missed something. Barbara went searching for her and found her checking around the bathtub. With a smile, Barbara leaned against the doorway with her arms crossed.

“See anything important?”

Arryn stood up straight and turned around to face her, and she returned the smile. “I found this and got hit with the worst kind of nostalgia,” she held up the empty container of deodorant and Barbara sighed longingly.

“What I’d do to just be able to shower for like _five_ minutes. Or less! To use shampoo and soap. Cleaning ourselves off in rivers or any other dirty water we find isn’t the same. It does _nothing_ to make me feel cleaner.”

“I bet the people around here have showers,” Jack spoke from behind Barbara, and she looked at him over his shoulder. “They have power and schools do have showers in locker rooms. I’m sure they found a way to make it work.”

“It would explain why they don’t look half as bad as we do,” said Arryn.

“It’s settled, then; let’s kill them and take a shower,” Barbara stated, clapping her hands together.

“All of them against the six of us?” Jack snorted, “Yeah, we’ll be fine.”

“What if we tried compromising? You know, ask to join them? You think that could be possible?”

“Barb, if they saw us, they would know right away that we were the ones responsible for killing some of their men yesterday. I don’t think that puts up high on their list of people they’d happily welcome into their territory,” Arryn reminded her.

“So, back to we _kill_ them and take a shower!” Barbara grinned, looking back and forth between her and Jack. Jack smiled softly and shook his head, and Barbara’s grin quickly faltered. The three of them headed out and toward the living room where everyone else was now gathered.

“I’m sorry we can’t do that, Barbara, but we’ve got a plan on what to do, and if it goes through well, we’ll make it out of this city alive and probably unharmed,” Jack assured her.

“Probably,” she drawled out.

“Probably,” Aaron parroted as walked to her and threw an arm around her neck. He waited until they all had their eyes on him before going over the plan again, specifically for Gavin to hear it for the first time, “Okay, so after staring at this building almost all night, I finally realized we have a better chance sneaking out through the school rather than trying to go completely around. They do have people surrounding each easy way around, but there’s one spot that leads into the school that they don’t have as securely protected,” he let go of Barbara to head to the window and point to the exact spot he meant.

“Alright, over there on the left toward the East 70 sign, those double doors. There are a few people guarding it, of course, but there’s also the most cars parked out. We can use those cars to keep our cover and sneak up. From the looks of it, those people are the only ones in that area. The rest of the people of patrolling the right side, especially the parking lot, and then down the street.

“We can’t see the other side of the building, but I’m pretty sure that’s where the rest of their people are, and there’s sure to be a lot more inside. Anyway, those doors on the left are our only chance to get inside. We’ll sneak up and quietly take them out. Our next problem we’ll be hoping no one is too close to the doors inside. We’ll quietly navigate through the hallways, take out anyone that stands in our way, and take anything we see. It sounds easy and it won’t be, but it’s our best bet.

“While you guys were sleeping, Barb and I headed out of here to look for other possible exits to avoid the school entirely. But just as we feared, they have people surrounding the building so we can’t get out, except from where we snuck in. Out through there will led up toward those doors if we quickly sneak around building next door and out the alley.”

“And even if we did try getting out from another exit and took out the people guarding the area, there would still be more to deal with down the street and nothing to hide behind,” Barbara added. Miles grimaced.

“The only thing I’m getting out of this is that we’re going to die,” Gavin stated. “One way or another. Fantastic.” Ryan scowled at him, but he didn’t get to say anything, because Miles spoke first.

“I hate to add to the negativity, but I kind of agree with Gavin here. Going through the school is just prolonging our death than going through the streets.”

“Are you just going to give up, Miles?” Ryan asked, a bit more bitterly than he had wanted. Miles’ eyes widened.

“I’m just saying,” he whispered.

“No,” Aaron shook his head, turning away from the window, “We’re not dying today. We’re going to make it out. Everyone just needs to stay close, keep your weapons out and ready, and run if you need to. That’s always the rule: run.”

“Okay, fine. Let’s just get on with this,” Miles said, walking to the couch to pick up the pet carrier bag where Joe still slept soundly inside. Ryan frowned as he listened to Miles baby-talk the tabby.

“Hey, Miles… uh, don’t you think it’s time that we… let him go?”

Miles cut himself off from telling Joe something about feeding him later to gape at Ryan. Even Gavin raised an eyebrow questioningly at the man.

“ _What_?” Miles questioned. “You’re telling me to leave Joe behind?”

“I’m not saying to leave him behind to spite you. I’m just saying, it’s probably best for him. I…” Ryan took a deep breath to recollect his thoughts, “Look, what we’re about to attempt is dangerous. Something could happen to him in there. It’s a wonder that nothing has yet to-“

“No, no, no. Ryan, something _could_ _have_ happened to him yesterday when Gavin and I got stuck in some trouble, but he had been with Arryn. Somehow, Joe’s always protected and safe-“

“Miles, that was just a good coincidence that you decided to hand him to Arryn before we got inside the city. It was… good _luck_ , and luck eventually runs out-“

“He’s a _good_ cat, Ryan. He has _never_ meowed in situations we didn’t want him to. In fact, he hardly makes any noise,” Miles set the carrier down and stepped forward toward Ryan, “You know, ever since we found that carrier in one of the pet stores, it’s been no different than carrying my backpack. It’s easier now that I don’t have to carry him completely. He doesn’t get in my way of holding my bow anymore.”

“I just don’t want anything to happen to him in there,” Ryan argued. Miles pursed his lips and averted his eyes, because he wouldn’t deny that risking the poor cat’s life was what made him the most nervous about the plan. And yes, Joe had never exposed them before, but who’s to say he wouldn’t meow a little too loud while they were making their way through?

“What’s he going to do on his own, though?”

“You’ve got plenty of cat food stocked up. Just leave it here for him.”

“And when it’s all gone?”

Ryan didn’t have to say anything if he hadn’t wanted to, because the devastation on his face told Miles everything. “I’m sorry,” he mouthed anyway. Miles sighed in defeat as he looked back at the carrier. Joe was peeking out at him, eyes dilated, like he was ready to pounce.

“Okay… you’re right. Let’s just go.”

Ryan was going to tell him something else, but he changed his mind at the last second and faced everyone else. Each of them were staring at Miles sympathetically, except Gavin. Gavin was staring at Ryan with squinted eyes and Ryan was about ready to tell him to shut up if he tried speaking.

“Are we ready?” He asked instead. Gavin nodded, as did the others. “Well, alright then.” Adjusting the straps on his backpack, he led the way out of the apartment. One by one, they followed him.

Miles stayed behind a moment and bent down in front of the carrier. Joe the Cat was staring at him, patiently waiting for what was to come next. Miles opened his mouth, but clamped it shut when he eyed his own backpack resting near the end of the couch. His eyebrows rose slightly, as did the corners of his lips.

He met up with them moments later as they started making their way down to the next floor. Ryan was helping them each make the jump down and when it came to Miles’ turn, he tensed a few before offering his hand. Miles grabbed it without hesitation and they jumped down together. Arryn waited until she was walking side by side with Miles, and she placed a hand on his arm.

“Hey, you okay?” She asked him, only quiet enough for him to hear. He nodded, flashing her a reassuring smile.

“Everyone get down,” Barbara called. They all did as they were told and crawled up to the window she was looking out from. But they could hear it. Another vehicle was approaching, or rather, more than one. Four motorcycles rode up to the doors the group was aiming to enter from and the two men guarding the doors greeted the new strangers, even hugging a few of them.

They parked their bikes, but their helmets remained on as they were quickly escorted inside, and they were definitely much too far to make out what they were saying.

“Great, four more to deal with,” Jack mumbled. Without wasting anymore time, they stood back up and continued on their way down the complex. None of the men or women were inside with them, which made the descend less of a hassle.

Once on the lowest floor, they made sure to crawl their way up to the window they had originally entered the day before. They couldn’t risk anyone outside seeing them move around, or seeing their heads.

“Okay, I’ll jump out first, and let you guys know if it’s clear to go,” Ryan quietly told the others, and they allowed him to go with a pat on his back. Outside, Ryan immediately found himself staring at someone’s back, but with the distance between them, he had time to rush behind the dumpster nearby. They didn’t see him. He pulled off his backpack to search for something he could use to defend himself when he felt a new presence next to him. He frantically grabbed his rifle, but the fact that he wasn’t already dead caught him off guard.

“Ryan,” there was no mistaking that accent.

“Gavin,” he hissed, turning his head to snarl at him. “I told you to _wait_.”

“I wanted to talk to you alone.”

“This isn’t exactly the time,” Ryan was hardly whispering.

“I can’t remember much about last night, well… it’s just not very clear, and trying to think back makes me feel worse. But I do remember what you said about Ray-“

“Gavin-“

“I also thought a lot about what you said to me before we left the house.”

“I don’t want to talk about this right now. There is someone over there who can hear us.”

Gavin rolled his eyes, yet he went on, “It doesn’t get easier, does it?” Ryan’s expression softened, though he was still irritated that Gavin chose _this_ moment to have this talk. Gavin’s expression was unreadable, no surprise there, so Ryan merely shook his head.

Gavin blinked, remaining silent as he seemed to take Ryan’s answer in, and then he looked away from him to peek around the dumpster. “Have anything sharp I could use?” He asked, holding out his hand.

Ryan dug into his backpack. “Actually, I do,” he pulled out a standard kitchen knife Ray had kept in there. Tentatively, he handed it to Gavin. Gavin looked up at the window. With Barbara staring at him, he signaled for her to get out.

“I’ll quietly handle this idiot if he turns around,” he whispered to Ryan, “As soon as you and everyone else are out of sight, I’ll follow.”

“Are you _sure_?”

“Yes, I’ll be fine. He seems to be distracted by something across the street anyway.”

Ryan bit down on his lower lip and waved his friends over. Barbara carefully jumped out, then Arryn, Jack, Miles, and Aaron. With Ryan leading the way again, they sneaked down the other way to go around the next building from the back. Gavin watched them, waiting until each of them had disappeared before he braced himself to head that way as well. Slowly, he stood high enough to move without being on his knees.

“HEY!” Gavin halted in his tracks and if he wasn’t already dealing with a migraine, he would be getting one. “I’VE GOT HIM!” The man was yelling to his friends across the street, and Gavin took off without another thought.

Around the corner, he saw his friends were already gone, or at least hiding well somewhere. Good, he thought. It was better if these people only knew about him. Let them think he was the only one behind the deaths. He looked around at his surroundings for any place to cover him, but he knew he had less than a minute before a group of them were coming after him and the entire school was on bigger lockdown to keep an eye out for him.

Gavin heard the thundering footsteps coming his way just as he looked up and saw a ladder he could yank down. He jumped up a few times, his fingers barely brushing against the damn thing, and by the time he decided to just run, it was too late. They had reached him and he was too lost in contemplating whether to pull out his pistol or use the knife. He did toss the knife at one of them, managing to stab them in the shoulder, but it did him no good, because another was already grabbing at him. He struggled in their grip to break free; spewing profanities and kicking at whoever got near, but they only laughed.

Another came up to him from behind, taking hold of his arms and roughly forcing them back. He felt something cold and hard wrap around his wrists, and it took him bit to realize they were handcuffing him.

“Why aren’t we just killing him here and now?!” One of them demanded.

“The bosses want to see ‘im first. They’ll decide what to do from there.”

Gavin continued to squirm, though it was no use. There were three against one, and they were all holding onto him somehow. With a huff, he accepted his defeat and started to walk normally as they pushed him toward the exact doors he was supposed to have snuck into. If this was how he was going to go, after so many months of surviving, well… so be it. He wasn’t afraid, that was for sure. He was more annoyed, because he _almost_ got away, but he definitely wasn’t scared. He could have died yesterday, or the week before that. He could have died the first month everything began, or even earlier than that.

Really, he’d been prepared to die by this point, and he was frankly surprised he was still alive. But here was his time. Here was the moment it would happen; inside a high school in Nashville, Tennessee. And he just wasn’t scared of his fate, or _how_ they would do it. If they decided on torture, on a slow death, he knew he wouldn’t scream or beg for them to stop, because the death would eventually follow. He would just have to endure through it until the end. But if they did it quick and painless, even better. Actually, what _did_ scare him, to a certain extent, was how he thought to himself, “Finally.”

Finally, he was going to die.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I knew this sequel would end up being longer than five chapters. I know myself well. I mean, I'm definitely not passing 10/11 chapters, though. So we are still close to the end, just not as close as before.... I'm just really enjoying writing this. I love zombies and post apocalyptic worlds, and I have a lot of fun with writing this stuff. And with The Walking Dead coming back soon (lmao, tomorrow), I have zombies on my mind a lot. Therefore, I made this longer, because I started getting so many more ideas as I wrote the chapters I already had planned, and now I'm working with those ideas. 
> 
> Man, even after I'm done with this, though, I'm still going to write more zombies, specifically a one shot that's inspired by a certain game........ heh.
> 
> Anyway, song for this chapter is "The Night We Met" by Lord Huron. I think after you read this chapter, you'll know which part and _who_ that song goes to.

Ryan had quickly begun ushering his friends inside the next building through the door on the side. He stood outside a moment in hopes that Gavin, despite having been caught, would catch up to them and they would escape inside together. That hope flew out the window when he heard Gavin’s screams accompanied by the sound of cold laughter he did not recognize. He would have ran out to help, but his wrist was grabbed by Jack, and he was dragged into the building before he could manage to protest. Barbara shut the door behind him, and with help from Arryn, they blocked the door with the nearest file cabinets.

“Gavin’s out there!” Ryan practically growled, trying to rush past them. Jack and Miles merely pushed him back, though. After getting pushed back a few times, Ryan stopped trying and glared at them, brows furrowed and mouth agape. They were staring at him, baffled, like _he_ was the one making the poor choice.

“We’re not leaving him out there with them!” Ryan argued.

“We’re outnumbered, Ryan, and those people out there are angry. We can’t risk pissing them off any more. When people get angry, you know what happens,” Arryn reminded him, cautiously stepping closer to him, “… _no_ mercy. We intervene, Gavin’s immediately dead. If we wait, he has a chance, because _we’ll_ have a chance at rescuing him.”

“We have _no_ time!”

“We might-“

“No!” Ryan instantly cut Jack from saying anything else. He spun around to snarl at him and Jack narrowed his eyes at him. Ryan was unfazed, though. “You heard, Arryn – they’re _angry_. They think he was the only one responsible for killing a few of their friends, and you WANT TO TELL ME HE HAS A CHANCE AT LIVING IF WE _WAIT IT OUT_?!” He was looking at all of them, heat rising to his face, and teeth clenching.

And no one dared to argue back. No one dared to make any move.

Ryan inhaled sharply and shook his head. When he spoke again, his tone was calmer. “We stick _together_. We don’t leave _anyone_ behind. It’s how it’s always been. Now, you want to sit around and think of another damn plan, go on… go ahead! I won’t stop you, but I won’t stay to help. I’m going out there, and I’m bringing _our_ friend back. I’m not losing any more of you.” He turned to the door and had to hold himself back from screaming again when Barbara blocked his way.

“And we’re not losing you,” she told him. “We’re a team. We’ll save him, but not by going out there against all of those armed people. We’re not stupid, Ryan, _especially_ not you. I get what you’re saying – waiting is dangerous right now for him, but we also can’t die trying to save him. Otherwise, it’ll all be a waste. Let’s be smart, like always.”

 Ryan pursed his lips as he took a step back. He looked at everyone else over his shoulder and saw the petrified, lost expressions painted upon their faces. Except for Aaron. Aaron wasn’t even there. Ryan’s eyebrows shot up at the realization, frantically looking all around him.

“Now where the hell’s Marquis?!” He shouted, and everyone else must have only then realized as well, because their panic rose. “AARON?!”

“I’m up here,” he responded softly. Ryan’s head whipped up to the opening in the ceiling, a hole purposely broken in it seemed, above them. Aaron threw down a knotted rope, “This was hanging there, so I used it to climb up. There’s no other way of getting out of that room,” he pointed out to the fact that the door that would have led out of the small backroom they were closed into was sealed shut. “I can see a staircase up here, too, in the hallway. If we go up higher, I think we can find a window to look out and see what’s going on. This place gives me a good advantage, since it’s directly across the street from the school.”

“Let’s get going, then,” Barbara practically jumped onto the rope before beginning to pull herself up. Aaron helped her once she was close enough to him. Jack went on next, and then Arryn. Miles made a face when it was his turn.

“I’m fine with this, but I just don’t think I’m that great with rope climbing,” he admitted. Ryan sighed and bent down, stretching his arms forward with one hand underneath another.

“I’ll give you lift, you can grab onto the rope from a higher point, and Aaron will help you from there.”

Miles placed a foot on Ryan’s hands and lifted his other off the ground, and Ryan proceeded to standing up slightly to hold him up. Aaron took care of the rest after Miles grabbed hold of his hand. Ryan hurried on up afterward.

“Okay, we have to move fast,” he said, getting to his feet and rushing out of the room to find that staircase.

It was just the floor above where they found a window that wasn’t utterly boarded up, and they carefully ran to it, ducking as soon as they were near it. And they could see Gavin, handcuffed and _not_ struggling to get away, escorted inside.

“He’s just letting them take him,” Jack mumbled.

“What else is he supposed to do?” Arryn asked.

“Fight back?” Ryan offered.

Barbara lifted a hand to her mouth then. _“I'm keeping track of how many days I'm wasting being alive.”_ She gasped, gaining everyone’s attention. “He doesn’t care,” she whispered, averting her eyes from the scene.

“What?” Ryan questioned after a small moment.

“He doesn’t care that they caught him. He… he wants them to kill- to kill him. He…” Barbara swallowed hard, forcing back the tears already stinging in her eyes, “He wants to die.” Ryan stared horrifyingly at her, as if her words had the actual ability of wounding him physically.

“What they gonna do with him?” Someone in particular outside asked, loud enough to be heard, even if their voice was muffled.

“Shh, shh, listen,” Arryn breathed out. Ryan and Barbara returned their attention to the people standing around down there.

“Ah, I don’t fucking know. Bosses will know,” another answered.

“Well, we know Gavin will be okay for a little while,” said Arryn, pulling herself away from the window. “We have some time to think of what to do,” but she knew Ryan and Barbara’s minds were elsewhere.

Miles stood up, careful not to be seen, “Yeah, guys!” He tried helping, “We can save Gavin, and we can get the hell out of here. Things will go back to the way they were going, and we’ll be fine.” Ryan turned his head to face him, thinking of what to say in response, but there was a distinct meow that caught him off guard. As it did for everyone else in the room.

Everyone slowly turned to look questioningly at Miles, but Miles tilted his head to the side, staring back at them with the same kind of bewilderment.

“Miles?” Ryan began.

“Hmm?” Miles raised his eyebrows.

“Did your backpack just… _meow_?”

“That’s… that’s the _weirdest_ thing you’ve ever asked me,” although he moved away when Ryan got up and moved toward him.

“Miles,” Arryn was speaking now, standing next to him. She pointed to his backpack, noting how it was a bit open, “Why isn’t it zipped all the way?”

“I keep it like that so I can easily reach in to grab whatever I need-“

Ryan gave no other choice to explain as he marched to him and unzipped the backpack the rest of the way. A pair of big eyes stared up at him, and he huffed.

“ _Miles_!”

“You _really_ thought I was going to leave him behind?” Miles asked defensively. “You don’t _leave_ your kids behind.”

“You know, we have _no_ time to argue about this. Just remember, whatever happens to him is on you.”

Miles quickly zipped up his backpack to how it was before, only leaving it slightly open to give Joe the Cat some air, and he nodded. “Yeah, I get it. But if I die, take him with you.”

“Oh, shut up.”

“You’re not going to _die_ ,” Jack added.

“The one who _might_ is the one we’re taking too long making a plan for,” Aaron reminded them. Barbara’s face fell further at that. Aaron noticed, since he reached out and grabbed her hand. “Hey,” he said, voice quiet enough for only her to hear, “Maybe Gavin purposely sacrificed himself for us. Maybe he didn’t. Maybe he doesn’t care if they kill him, but either way, they won’t. Maybe he does want to just die, but we won’t let it happen. We’ll be there for him after this is over. We’ll remind him why there’s a reason to keep fighting.”

Barbara gave his hand a tight squeeze and nodded, although, she couldn’t recall the last time she felt this uneasy.

 

* * *

 

“Get the _fuck_ in there,” one of the men – David, according to a woman they had walked past – holding Gavin growled as he all but tossed Gavin into a particular classroom.

With his hands cuffed behind him, Gavin couldn’t use them to break his fall, and he fell forward, flat on his face. And when he was yanked back up on his feet, he didn’t resist. David spun him around and held him up by the chin. Gavin merely furrowed his eyebrows at him.

“You have no idea how _fucking_ pissed I am at you,” David spat at him, teeth gritted tightly together. “Do you know who that was that you killed? _HUH_?!” He tightened his grip on Gavin and Gavin unexpectedly let a whine escape him. “That was my _brother_ , you fucking _animal_!”

Gavin softened his expression, raising his eyebrows. “Oops,” he whispered. He felt David’s fist collide with the side of his face before he could even see it coming. He also had no time to regain himself from how much that actually hurt, because David went in for another hit, and then another. He then pushed Gavin back until Gavin was back on the floor, only to be yanked up once again a few seconds later. This time, however, David made sure Gavin was just on his knees.

As he had one hand wrapped around Gavin’s neck, David used his free one to reach into his back pocket and pull out a pocketknife. Gavin stiffened as David brought the object up and flipped it open close to his face. With the sharp end, David lightly skimmed over the scar on Gavin’s cheek.

“Look, someone was nice enough to leave a mark of where I should cut you,” he spoke viciously, like he was on the verge of laughing manically. Gavin glared up at him, prepared to show no fear, because he wasn’t about to give him the satisfaction. But then David swiped his small knife across the scar in one swift move that Gavin couldn’t help the choked groan he made.

He could feel the red liquid already making its way down the rest of his face, and he could see it drip onto the floor, next to his knees. David put the knife back in its place before digging his nails into the clean cut he’d created. Gavin bit down hard on his lower lip to prevent anymore sounds from coming out.

“This was for my little brother,” David told him, his voice low. He dug his nails deeper, his hand shaking from the force he was using. Gavin tried focusing on anything else but the fact that this man had just refreshed his scar and was now purposely cutting it open more with his own damn fingernails. It stung, oh it stung badly, but he didn’t want David to know that.

Finally, after what felt dreadfully too long, David stopped, and Gavin resisted the urge to sigh in relief. David looked over his own hand in disgust.

“You can have your blood back,” he hissed, wiping the hand on the front of Gavin’s blue and black flannel. With that, he got up and left, slamming the door behind him.

Gavin turned his head to spit, slightly alarmed to see blood accompanying his saliva. He must have bit himself when David punched him. He sighed. His entire face was hurting in some way – his left cheek was sore and tingly from the punches, and his right cheek stung from the cut that was still bleeding.

They were going for slow torture, then. He was ready just to get this over with.

“That’s our guy, huh?” He heard a woman outside ask.

“Yeah, and I can’t tell if David’s relieved or not that at least it ain’t that weird swordsman,” someone else responded.

“Hmm, I thought it would be. Think this guy’s alone?”

“I don’t know.”

Gavin was tempted to yell out that he was indeed alone, but he decided it was best not to make himself seem defensive about that. Instead, he looked around at his surroundings. The classroom looked a little more elaborate than any high school classroom he’d ever been in. Judging by the various maps and flags adorning the walls, he concluded it had been a history class. The windows at the far end caught his interest next, specifically the metal bars outside of the glass. No escape there.

He shifted as best as he could until he was sitting on his bottom instead of being on his knees. He might as well make himself comfortable until his fate was decided.

On the way up to this classroom, he had gotten a good look at how these people lived. Each classroom had been turned into different kinds of rooms – bedrooms, living rooms, and offices. There were more people than he originally thought, but there was definitely no sign of children. Though he did see plenty of young people, teenagers even.

Gavin had also gotten a glance of the cafeteria, which was perfect for them with the various tables and fully stocked kitchen. These people were truly lucky. They actually had a life going on, and Gavin despised them for it, because they were selfish. They were keeping everything for themselves.

A knock at the door startled him, but as soon as he composed himself, he snarled as he waited for whoever it was to enter. And they did a moment later. A woman, short blonde hair tied up messily, tattoos covering her arms, and a septum ring stepped in. What surprised Gavin the most, however, was the warm, genuinely friendly smile she gave him.

“Hey there,” she greeted. She even _sounded_ nice. Gavin kept his scowl; he wasn’t going to be fooled. “Oh, I see David’s anger got the best of him,” she gestured toward her own cheeks.

“What do you want?” Gavin blandly asked.

“British… huh, that’s interesting. Well, there’s nothing I want from you. I just wanted to come meet you. I’m Griffon,” she was smiling again, and there was just something about that smile that strangely comforted Gavin.

“Are you one of the _bosses_ they kept talking about? Are you here to kill me?”

She laughed softly. “No, I’m not here to kill you, and I’m definitely not one of the people in charge around here. I really did just want to come see you, to tell you that… we’re not bad people.” Gavin scoffed and she laughed again. “I’m serious. Our _bosses_ , especially, are not bad people. You can count on them not to kill you for what you did, but you do understand why we’re upset, right? You killed some of our friends.”

“They left me no choice,” Gavin told her. Griffon’s smile faltered a bit.

“I’m sorry about what David did to you. Want me to clean that up for you?”

“No.”

“Okay,” Griffon nodded. “Can you at least tell me your name?” Gavin averted his eyes. “We won’t kill you. That’s really the _main_ thing I wanted to come tell you, so that you don’t worry-“

“Oh, but if you wanted to kill me, I wouldn’t stop you,” Gavin snapped, looking up at her once more. “I’m not _worried_. I don’t _bloody_ care what you do to me.”

Now Griffon’s smile was completely gone. However, she bent down in front of him and reached her arms around him until she found the handcuffs. Gavin wanted to push her off him somehow, but then he felt his wrists become free, and he brought his own arms forward to see. She then stood up and turned away, but before she opened the door to leave, she said quietly, “I know you’re not alone, so, I’ll make sure your friends are okay.” Gavin opened his mouth to speak, though he found himself rendered speechless, and then he was alone again.

 

* * *

 

 

The men outside were talking again and at the mention of Gavin (“British dude”), Barbara rushed back to the window to get a better listen.

“I heard they might just let him go.”

“Are you fucking serious? Just like that?”

“Just like that.”

“Without a little lesson?”

“Oh, no… he’ll be getting a lesson, just maybe not a permanent one. But hey, I ain’t one of the bosses. I just know he ain’t leaving tonight. The decision will be made in the morning.”

From there, their conversation shifted to something completely different that Barbara couldn’t find herself to care about. She peeled away from the window to tell the others who’d been wandering the area in the building to find anything useful.

“Hey,” she called gently, peering out of the room.

“Yeah?!” Ryan answered from down the hall. He turned around to look at her and she fully stepped out of the room.

“So, Gavin’s going to be okay until tomorrow morning – according to some guys out there. One of them also thinks they’re not going to kill him, but I highly doubt it.”

“We have all night to do this, then?”

Barbara nodded. “If they’re not lying about that part, yeah. Although, I believe them there, just because they look like the type of assholes who would purposely make someone’s death take longer.”

Ryan’s eyebrows squeezed together as he rubbed his chin. They’d been hiding away inside the building for what felt to be a good few hours until they finally decided on exploring. Every plan they could come up with seemed too far-fetched, especially when considering they were just six of them. Ryan let out a deep sigh and opened his mouth to say something, but Miles cut him off.

“I think I just found the perfect thing to help us out.”

Both he and Barbara widened their eyes as they whipped their heads up to see Miles walking down the steps from being on the third floor. Miles was horizontally holding a poster board filled with various drawings, and scribbled handwriting across it in black and red ink. Judging by the awestruck laced within his eyes, whatever that poster said was something truly worth knowing.

“This is a map of the entire school from inside,” he said, handing it over to Ryan once he was close. “Somebody must have gotten in there and memorized the place, or someone from over there accidentally forgot that map here.”

Ryan looked it over, noticing how each classroom was drawn, each area, had a title of what the room was written next to them. He hurried back to the window in the original room to connect where the drawing started from their point of view. Miles and Barbara quickly went after him.

“Here,” he tapped over the drawing of the entrance on the bottom left corner of the poster, “That’s where they entered with Gavin,” he looked out the window to see the exact doors, almost _taunting_ him. Barbara and Miles followed his gaze from the paper to the real thing outside. “They took Gavin in from there and led him into one of the rooms, but I’m guessing it wasn’t any of the occupied ones.”

“Some of these on the second floor are empty,” Barbara noted, hovering her finger over them.

“He might be trapped inside of those, then,” Miles added.

“Now we just need to keep figuring out how we’re going to get in there without drawing attention,” Ryan told them. “We could always go through with our original plan from this morning, but I think we need to come up with something better – more efficient.”

“I agree,” Barbara nodded.

“You did great, Miles,” Ryan said, patting the younger man on the shoulder.

“Thanks,” Miles faintly smiled at him, “Now let’s just try saving our friend. I’m so tired of this crap.”

Even so, when the sun started setting and they still barely had any plan, Ryan insisted that anyone that needed to rest was going to rest for a bit. Meanwhile, he and Jack remained near the window in case anything suspicious occurred. But nothing was really going on, nothing that caught their attention, until Ryan caught sight of a purple hoodie that had him sitting upright for a better look.

“What is it?” asked Jack, because the way Ryan’s lips were parting and his eyes were wild with anticipation wasn’t a comforting thing to see. “Ryan?” He tried again.

“Hey, there you are,” one of the main guards in front of the double doors greeted the purple hooded stranger. Ryan kept himself low as to not be seen, but he followed that person’s every movement. Jack was also staring out, hopelessly searching for whatever the hell had Ryan’s attention so much. And then he saw it, too.

The person reached up to pull their hood off their head and Ryan shifted a little. Jack thought he could honestly hear Ryan’s heart thumping rapidly. When the hood was off and bright, blonde hair was revealed, Ryan could feel himself physically deflate from the tension that’d been building up in him. Then the person turned around for a moment to wave at someone, and Ryan averted his gaze, because he didn’t recognize that face at all.  

But he laughed, weakly and joylessly, and shook his head. Why was he disappointed? Had he really thought he would see black hair, short hair when that hood came off? Had he thought he would see black rimmed glasses, scruffy facial hair, and warm brown eyes that appeared to be so curious of the world? Yes, that’s _exactly_ what he had thought, and he laughed at himself for being the fool that he allowed himself to be for a few minutes there.

“I’m sorry,” he heard Jack whisper next to him. Ryan flashed him a crooked smile, hoping that would be the end of that, but he wasn’t surprised when Jack continued talking. “He would be so impressed of the way you’re handling everything, of the way you’ve _been_ handling everything. We wouldn’t be alive if it weren’t for you.”

“Yeah,” Ryan softly replied, sitting himself up against the wall. Jack left it at that, thankfully, though it didn’t halt the many things running through Ryan’s mind.

 _He bent over in an attempt to catch his breath. That had been the longest he’d run to get away from those_ things _. There were_ so _many of them, chasing him, from different directions, but he managed an escape. And now here was, in the middle of he wasn’t sure where. Oh, but the_ best _part – his only source of light was the damn moon. He figured he was alone, and then he heard the snaps of twigs behind him. Clutching tighter to the bat he’d found during his escape out of the mall, he spun around to attack, yet he stopped when he came face to face with a young looking man. Maybe it was his glasses, or the honest terror on his face, but Ryan knew this guy wasn’t here to threaten him._

 _“Whoa, okay,” the guy sighed in relief. “Man, I thought you were going to bash my head in with that – wait, is that… is_ that _how you’re killing them?”_

_Ryan lowered the bat and softened his expression. “As of this morning…” he mumbled. The guy straightened his stance and grinned lopsidedly, but Ryan could still see the slight worry in it._

_“Impressive,” he said._

_“Ray?!” Another voice called. Ryan braced himself once more._

_“I’m over here!” The guy –_ Ray _– called back. Not too long later, three new people appeared – a woman and a man who looked about Ray’s age, and then another older man with a beard who looked near Ryan’s age._

_“Who are you?” The woman asked. Ryan squinted his eyes at her._

_“I could ask you the same.”_

_Ray sighed. “She’s Arryn, and he’s Miles,” he pointed to the younger man, “and Jack,” he clapped on hand on the bearded man’s shoulder. “So, you can tell us your name. We’re nice enough to tell you ours.”_

_Ryan inhaled sharply and brought his bat back down to a lower level, and the gesture caused Ray to flinch a little. Ryan raised an eyebrow questioningly at him for that. “Fine,” he finally spoke, “I’m Ryan.”_

_“Where’s the rest of your group?”_

_“I-uh, I’m not with anyone.”_

_“Are you serious?” Miles asked in disbelief._

_“I was, but, uh… things happen,” Ryan shrugged. Although Ray wasn’t particularly fond of that answer, he held his hand out anyway, mustering up another one of those childish smiles. Ryan hesitated for a mere moment before shaking his hand. He also almost smiled in return, except that he wasn’t sure what these people’s real intentions were, but he also didn’t want to be quick to judge._

_“Nice to meet you, Ryan,” Ray then said. Ryan let himself relax a little, and he nodded._

_“Yeah… you too.”_

First came the sound of glass shattering, then came the _boom!_ that seemed to rattle the ground even where they were. Ryan and Jack jumped to their feet as they looked outside, and much to their horror, they saw flames engulfing some of the top and bottom rooms.

“Gavin,” Ryan breathed out.

There was yelling, cries of desperation, and loud engines running. Jack looked toward the far left, past the building, and cursed under his breath as he saw a line of trucks driving toward the school at full speed. A few people were sticking out through the windows, assault rifles in hand. It wasn’t until they started firing at people on the street that Ryan turned around and shouted out in panic, “WE LEAVE NOW!”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get this, I even have the _next_ chapter   
>  finished already, but I'll wait a few days before posting it lol. I'm seriously having so much fun with this.

For a while, they had been in a van they managed to find after nearing the next city, but as it seemed like with everything else, their luck eventually ran out with that. The only thing keeping them sane was that their van decided to break down not _too_ far from Nashville. They could easily make the rest of the trip on foot without completely exhausting themselves, because they were merely less than an hour away at that point.

Joel, however, was constantly rubbing his eyes and yawning as he trailed behind Adam. Mostly everyone else, except for Burnie who’d been driving, had taken a nap in the vehicle. He hadn’t been sleepy then, but now… well.

“Adam,” he practically whined.

“Yeah?” Adam responded softly, glancing at him over his shoulder.

“Tell me something that will keep me awake.”

“What am I supposed to tell you?”

“A story?”

Adam sighed, though he slowed his pace just enough for Joel to be walking side-by-side with him. “I feel like I’ve told you all of my best stories already.”

“Tell me again. I don’t care if I’ve heard it. If it’s from you, I’ll like it a hundred times!”

“Wow, you _are_ sleepy.”

Joel halted in his tracks momentarily to gape at Adam. “I’m offended that you don’t believe that I just appreciate you that much,” he truly did sound offended. Adam laughed lightly and shoved him forward to start walking again.

“I’m sorry, Joel.”

“No, you have to say you’re sorry like you really-”

“Guys, look!” Lindsay suddenly shouted. Everyone turned their attention to her before following her finger and spotting the dark cloud of smoke in the distance.

“Holy shit,” Meg breathed.

“And then there’s _that_ billboard over there,” Chris pointed out. “Danger beyond this point. Yeah, no kidding.”

“Well, if that sign wasn’t enough of a warning,” Burnie spoke, gesturing toward the smoke. “I think this is where we stop and go a different way.” Ashley, Meg, and Chris nodded.

“Wait, _what_?” Lindsay asked, stepping forward until she was standing right in front of Burnie. “We can’t stop here! We’re so close!”

“There’s a fire going on over there. I don’t want us risking our lives to figure out why. There’s probably something happening that we _don’t_ need to get involved with. It’s also getting pretty dark and it’s not safe to be running around out here at night.”

“But if we don’t go, this entire trip was a waste!”

“Lindsay, do you really think they’d be there?” asked Ashley, the softness in her tone almost relaxing Lindsay’s growing frustration.

“I don’t know,” Lindsay admitted, shrugging, and speaking in spurts. “But whatever’s going on, maybe we should check it out. What if it’s actually _good_ people suffering? We can help them.” She gasped and turned to Adam. “You’re always talking about wanting to help people, because there’s barely any of us left, so we can’t just let the ones we can save go if they’re honestly good.”

Adam raised his eyebrows. “I know what you’re doing, Lindsay. I mean, you are right about that, but… uh,” he moved his gaze toward the cloud of smoke again and sighed, “this might be really bad.” Everyone else, but Meg, mumbled in agreement.

“Okay,” Lindsay threw her hands up, “I’m going to go check it out. I can meet up with the rest of you later, but I have to see what’s going on. I came here specifically to see Nashville, to see if Gavin would be there, and if he is there somewhere, I’m not passing the opportunity up just because there’s a fire going on in _one_ part of the city.” She was about to rush past them before she caught a glimpse of Meg standing off to the side.

“I’m coming with you,” Meg then said, deep determination in her hazel eyes. It was probably the best thing Lindsay had heard all day.

Joel groaned loudly that everyone looked at him with furrowed eyebrows. “I’m going, too,” he announced, dragging his feet over to stand next to the two girls.

“You don’t have to if you really don’t want to,” Meg teased as she crossed her arms.

“Look, I would rather find a place I can lay down and sleep for a few… uh, weeks, but I can’t get the way Gavin was acting when I was with him out of my head. If we can honestly help him, then, I’m in.”

“Well, if you’re in, so am I,” Adam took a step forward, smiling at Joel.

Subconsciously, or perhaps purposely, the four of them turned to face Burnie, Ashley, and Chris. Burnie looked away from them to take another long look at that smoke.

 

* * *

 

Even after hearing the explosions occur near where he was and smelling the faint stench of smoke already clogging the air throughout the building, Gavin sat still and massaged his wrists. Clearly a whole other group came bursting into the city and were now attacking the people here to get what they wanted: supplies, food, and just anything they could possibly get their hands on. And Gavin didn’t really care if sitting there and letting himself be burned alive was the way he was going to go, until he wondered about his friends. Were they still safe? Had they left already? Or had they been spotted by the group of maniacs? He had no way of knowing any of the answers to those questions unless he saw for himself.

So without further hesitation, he leapt to his feet and ran to the door. What he thought would be a fight in breaking the door open proved to be no fight at all, because it was unlocked. He had actually almost fallen onto the floor in the hallway from flinging it open, because he hadn’t expected that. His first initial thought was Griffon purposely left it unlocked for him, and he found himself hoping for a moment that she was okay.

Outside of the classroom, people were running everywhere, frantically grabbing what they could before fleeing to an exit. Gavin wasn’t sure whether to follow them or find a different way out. He spent a good minute going back and forth before finally deciding on following them; they knew the school better than him.

What the hell was he going to do, though? He didn’t have a single clue where his friends would be if they were still around, and he didn’t even have a weapon on him. They had taken his backpack and every weapon he had on him away from him after they had captured him.

“ _You_!”

Gavin abruptly stopped running at the sight of David standing up ahead, shooting daggers at him with his piercing blue eyes. And when David began charging at him, Gavin held his hands up in front of him. “Really? In the middle of this, you’re going after _me_?” He asked.

“If I die killing you, it’ll be worth it, you son of BITCH!” David failed at tackling him, though, because Gavin quickly took off back down the hall from where he came. “YOU’RE NOT GETTING AWAY ALIVE! I WON’T LET YOU AFTER WHAT YOU DID TO ME!”

Gavin picked up his pace, but there was a window at the end of the hall, and one of the bandits from outside tossed another one of their bombs through it. And a man who looked no older than him had been running right by that window when it happened. Gavin skidded to stop, preventing himself from falling by catching himself on the wall. The man had been hit almost completely, but that was enough. Gavin watched with wide eyes and mouth hanging open as the man flailed about, screaming in agony as the flames concealed him.

Gavin would have ran off, but he couldn’t look away, no matter how much he wanted to. The man finally came to his defeat as he fell forward, body going instantly limp. David had also seen what happened after catching up to Gavin, but unlike Gavin, he’d managed to force his attention away. Gavin was still staring in horror of the dead, burnt body in front of him, and that gave David the chance at grabbing and holding him in a headlock. Gavin blinked hard and wildly reached his hands up to pull David’s arms away, but he was definitely much stronger.

“You feel that?” David whispered, lips brushing against Gavin’s left ear. “You feel that lack of air? You’ll be dead soon.” And Gavin really did believe it was going to happen, but someone came to his recue by striking David. David released Gavin as he fell back by the impact, and Gavin fell forward onto his knees.

He gasped for air, coughing here and there, and he looked up to lock eyes with Griffon. They heard something whip through the air near them and at the sound of glass shattering, they realized another bomb had been thrown. Instead of catching a person on fire this time, it instantly lit up the papers covering the wall to their left.

“Oh, god, we have to get out of here,” Griffon said, holding out her hand for Gavin. Gavin didn’t even hesitate to take it. She pulled him up to his feet and they began running together, but it seemed the flames were following them on the walls as they spread across from paper to paper, and anything flammable it could reach.

Gavin swallowed and ignored how much it hurt to do so. He desperately wanted to sit down until his throat felt better, but he _had_ to see his friends. He _had_ to know they were alive. The smoke surrounding him wasn’t helping his situation, though. He began to cough harder and he did stop for a moment to regain himself, and in the meantime, David successfully tackled him down. Gavin went down with a loud whine as the side of his head slammed onto the floor. The pain rattled throughout his skull that he could have sworn he heard ringing in his ears.

He was flipped over and then straddled, and when he opened his eyes, he saw what Griffon had managed to do to him with whatever she had hit him with. There was a bloody wound near David’s hairline that was trailing more blood down his face in two streams. Gavin also saw other things, though… black spots.

No… no, he couldn’t pass out now. Not now.

He heard what sounded like part of the ceiling collapsing behind him, and that was followed by Griffon yelling at David to stop.

“Griffon, _go_!” He managed to shout. She didn’t deserve to get hurt because of him; she hardly knew him.

“Shut the _fuck_ up,” David growled at him.

Gavin allowed the relief of not hearing Griffon anymore fill him, because she probably left to get to safety, and that’s what mattered. But now David was back at trying to choke Gavin. With his arms and hands being free, Gavin grabbed David’s face by its sides and did the first thing that came to mind; he dug his thumbs into the man’s eyes. David cried out, immediately letting go of Gavin’s neck to try and pull Gavin’s hands away from his face. The black spots were increasing as Gavin’s strength decreased, but he put all of what was left of it into what he was doing to David. It felt slippery and _repulsing_ , yet he dug in deeper until his entire vision was practically covered in darkness.

That’s when he dropped his hands and fought to keep his own eyes opened, fought to stop coughing. All he could see was the blurry images of the red and orange flames dancing around him. All he could smell was the dark grey smoke accompanying those flames. All he could feel was David on him, so with the last pinch of energy he had, he attempted to push the man off him. Then he saw a pair of new feet approaching them. He thought he imagined it, especially with how calm that person was walking, but when he heard the slashing, _wet_ sound of something sharp against flesh, loud and clear, he knew it was real. David fell off and landed next to him, his head hardly attached to him anymore. Gavin wanted to look up and see who the hell had saved him now, knowing for certain it was not Griffon, but he couldn’t. He just got a quick glance of a long, blood covered blade and felt himself starting to get lifted up before he threw his head back and gave into the weakness.

 

* * *

 

He woke to the feeling of a damp cloth gently wiping his still fresh cut on his cheek. Although it felt nice, he flinched away from it, but then it reappeared, and he sighed. How was he alive? He felt as if he’d been run over by a bus. He even struggled with opening up his eyes, so they remained shut for a little longer as his cut continued to be attended to.

He was… comfortable, so damn comfortable. Wait, where was he?

Lazily, he started opening his eyes, his vision a total blur. He blinked hard a few times until he could see well. Yes, a bus had definitely run him over or something. He glanced down to find himself wrapped in a heavy blanket. Christ, he couldn’t remember the last time he had such a nice blanket covering him. But he also appeared to be lying on the floor. The blanket sure did its job of not making the floor feel so harsh underneath him.

The damp cloth was removed and Gavin finally shifted his eyes to see his savior. He had already begun to think it was his group, his _friends_. He was thinking they were stupid enough to run into that burning building to save him, and now they were cleaning him up. He expected to see Barbara’s warm smile or Ryan’s hardened expression that he used to disguise his concern sometimes.

Never would he had expected to look right into the beautiful brown eyes that belonged to Michael Jones.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to end the chapter where Gavin blacks out, but I was like "Okay, we've gone long enough without seeing Michael". So... :D


	9. Chapter 9

Despite his body being in utter protest of any kind of movement, Gavin kicked the blanket wrapped around him off and jumped up on his feet. He ran the whole across the wide room they were in before his coughing fit began, and he was forced to stop. He was facing the corrugated metal wall, one hand on it and the other clutching his chest. His heart was pounding so painfully in there that in between his coughing spurts, he took deep breaths to relax.

And just when he felt himself calm down, a gentle hand grabbed him by the shoulder. Gavin shrugged it off before turning around and pressing his back against the wall like he had no other option. Running apparently did him no justice at the moment. It was also for the best to stay still anyway, because every single ache within his body was coming through all at once.

There was a reasonable amount of space between the two of them, enough to give Gavin room to breathe comfortably. Yet Michael took a step forward, cautiously. And Gavin reacted like a frightened, small animal trying to get away but not knowing where to turn.

“Gavin,” Michael spoke. His voice was the very same – the very same voice Gavin fell in love with seven years ago. It was something deep, but not too low, and right now, there was concern in it, making it sound impossibly sweet.

That wasn’t the only thing that was the same: his curly hair perfectly framing his face, his light brown eyes, and those adorable freckles splattered around. Perhaps the only different thing about him was most of his clothing. He was wearing a faded denim jacket with a grey hood, jeans practically the identical color of that jacket (but they looked dusty, like he’d been doing plenty of crawling around), and his shirt was black with scratched, faded red letters that Gavin didn’t bother figuring out what they spelt out. Besides all of that, Michael had the same shoes from before, but they were terribly close to their breaking point.

But… _how_? _How_ was he actually standing right in front of _Michael_?

“D-don’t touch me,” Gavin warned. Michael halted, and then he stepped back a few.

“I just think you should lie down a little longer; I didn’t exactly find you in the best condition.”

It was like staring at a ghost. Gavin averted his eyes, refusing to move from his spot. “I’m dead, aren’t I?” He asked, his tone dropping to a whisper. Michael’s eyebrows twitched together.

“No… I saved you in time. Why the hell would you think you’re dead? You can feel everything, right?” There was that rising concern from before.

Gavin kept on avoiding eye contact as he spoke again, “But you’re… you’re supposed to be… dead.”

Michael’s lips parted. He had not heard that correctly, had he? “You thought I was… _dead_?” He almost struggled with getting the question out, specifically because he was nervous of the answer he was going to receive.

There were various things Gavin was feeling, physically and emotionally, but one of those things hadn’t been anger, until now. His hands curled into fists as he lifted his head to glare at Michael, because _why_ was Michael so surprised? Sure Gavin had never found a body, but everything he had found, everything he had heard led to that conclusion... hadn’t it? Yes, it had, otherwise his friends would have told them. And Gavin wanted to tell Michael that, along with a dozen other questions he had haunting him, except he couldn’t, because it was then that he remembered… his _friends_.

“Oh, no,” he said under his breath. Ignoring the confusion on Michael’s face, Gavin frantically scanned the room until he spotted a door that was possibly the exit – his exit out. His legs were ready to give out on him, his head was sensitive and _throbbing_ in every area, his face felt numb, and his eyes were begging for sleep, but he still needed to know. He _needed_ to see them.

He quickly pushed himself away from the wall and rushed around Michael to avoid any contact of any kind, as if Michael were some sort of disease.

“ _Gavin_!” He heard him call, but no… no, there was just no way. There was no way that was honestly Michael calling him. It just couldn’t be possible. It couldn’t be real. Because Michael no longer existed in his world, in any world. That was what he would whisper to himself in the back of his mind as he painfully tried to fall asleep every night.

And what an awful time it always was each time he had to do that.

But he was _just_ getting used to it.

Now the world was taunting him again, laughing at him, telling him to forget everything he knew, every wall he’d been carefully constructing since _that_ night.

He couldn’t handle it. Not now. Not after everything.

It was too much in such little time.

It was too much. _Too_ much.

Gavin reached the door, gasping for air, because his strength and energy were at their lowest – the lowest they’d ever been. And he was coughing once more, though he still grabbed the doorknob. Oh, he couldn’t do it. He fell to his knees, the coughing fit increasing until he was practically gagging. Michael was gently pulling him up seconds later, and he didn’t stop him, but he did feel himself start to tremble as he thought about how this was definitely _Michael_ holding him. Only Michael held him this way: tenderly yet protectively.

Instead of locking eyes with him, however, Gavin moved his head to the side so that he was looking over Michael’s shoulder. His gaze landed on where he’d been lying when he woke up. There was that blanket, a few pillows, a backpack with its biggest pocket open, and a… a sword. Gavin blinked a few times to make sure he was really seeing that, but he was.

“How?” He asked. Michael had been looking over his face, becoming awestruck all over again that he was with Gavin, and he was caught by surprise by the question. Gavin didn’t say anything of his prolonged silence, though, because Gavin wouldn’t even _look_ at him.

“How _what_?”

“How did you know to save me?”

Michael swallowed roughly. “I… I didn’t at first. I heard the fucking chaos going on, so I went outside, and… I saw… well, shit, I saw _Ryan_ run out of a building. I couldn’t believe it, but then I heard him shouting, asking where _you_ were, and I knew you were in trouble. I saw the school was on fire and… _god_ , Gavin, I was fucking terrified.”

“I have to save them,” Gavin stated, because he’d honestly stopped listening after the mention of Ryan. He attempted to squeeze his way out of Michael’s grip, but Michael acted quicker and held him tighter.

“Okay, we will, but you have to give yourself a break first.”

“No, _I_ will!”

“Gavin-”

“Let _go_ of me!”

Michael obliged, though Gavin lost his balance and immediately fell onto the floor. He sighed in defeat.

“You can go,” Michael finally said after a moment. He sounded just as defeated. “I just hope you do give yourself some time to recover a little. Um, I… I have food if you-”

“I don’t want anything from you,” Gavin grumbled in response.

Michael’s face fell further, if possible, but he nodded. “I’ll be over there if you…” his shoulders slumped and he murmured something else that sounded along the lines of, “If you need anything.” And he turned away to walk over to where that bed of soft blankets and pillows was.

Gavin remained in the exact spot and in the exact position he’d fallen in for a while. He wouldn’t deny how badly he did want to rest, though. So, after mentally talking himself into it, he shifted until he was sitting up against the door. And he glowered as he stared over at Michael.

 

* * *

 

One by one, they ran out into the open, ducking in cover behind anything that would suit them in the time being. Tires whirring to a stop, a ring of shots, a strangled cry, and many sounds of bodies dropping at once reached their ears. The occasional sounds of small explosions and glass shattering came in second. A few bullets flew in their direction as well, and when that began, Ryan wrapped his arm around the nearest person until they stopped.

They hadn’t been spotted yet, that was the good part. The bad part… they had no idea how they were going to make it out of this alive to get to Gavin.

Ryan clutched onto his rifle. They also couldn’t just stay still and do nothing. “Okay, _nobody_ move or get up unless I say so. Got it?” They all nodded. Ryan took a few deep breaths, bracing himself for what he was about to do. Barbara had told him he wasn’t stupid, but he certainly was when he jumped from his hiding spot and started to aim at the intruders sticking their heads out of the trucks. He took his shots, succeeding in practically each one, and he could see the rest of the people in those trucks getting their own guns out. It was their time.

Ryan was ready, but then he noticed someone run out of the school, and he instantly recognized him as one of the men who had taken Gavin inside. Ryan quickly reloaded and aimed toward him. The man saw him and skidded to stop, raising his hands up in front of him.  

“WHERE IS HE?!” Ryan yelled, though it was more of a growl. “WHERE’S GAVIN?!” And the bullets went off again by the people in the trucks. Ryan ducked back down in time, but now those people knew where they were. Aaron was on his right, so he gently grabbed his face to gain his full attention, because he knew damn well Aaron was on the verge of panicking.

“Run,” Ryan breathed out. A glass shattered next to them, followed by a small explosion, and they saw fire momentarily puff up in the form of a deadly cloud. And Ryan knew what they had to do. Still holding onto Aaron by his face, he pulled him down until they were both lying flat on the sidewalk. The others wasted no time in following his lead.

Eyes loosely shut, mouths open, shortened breaths, and some limbs sprawled out, they lied there silently as everyone else around them either ran for their lives or drove around wildly, hollering and using each of their weapons to their sick advantage. The six of them stayed as still as they could be, even when someone would run past them, get shot down, and land on top of them.

They didn’t dare move a muscle. They could only hope Gavin managed to make it out, or that their opportunity came soon.

 

* * *

 

There were only windows up high in the warehouse they were in, and Gavin could see it was way late into the night already. The only light within the building came from a few lit candles and a bit of moonlight from outside. His head kept on drooping forward every time he closed his eyes and it irritated him how he couldn’t just easily fall asleep for once. Well, he couldn’t blame himself at the moment; there was a lot on his mind, more than usual. And one of those things was no more than twenty feet from him, sleeping soundly.

Michael had fallen asleep almost as soon as he settled into the bed, but Gavin just couldn’t wrap his head around the fact that this was all happening. How, he kept asking. _How_?

One thing that was for sure, Gavin couldn’t sit up all throughout the night contemplating everything. He did need some rest if he wanted to get out of there the next morning without falling over. He allowed himself to slump lower in where he sat, just so that he could somehow find comfort in his spot. The weather outside was starting to get chilly again and inside the warehouse wasn’t all that warm either, so he hugged himself as he closed his eyes. And somehow, after a while of merely sitting there without moving and without opening his eyes for any reason, he drifted off.

It was the faintest grunt that woke him, though, and the sounds of someone dragging their feet. Once it registered to him what it was, his eyes opened wide and he gasped quietly. His first instinct was to look over at Michael… just in case, but he was relieved to find that it wasn’t Michael making those noises. He heard another grunt and realized it was coming from outside.

“Oh, bloody hell,” he whispered. Since he’d gotten to Nashville, he hadn’t seen any of those _things_. His only problem had been other humans that he almost forgot they weren’t the only threat to him.

It was evidently moving along just on the other side of the wall and Gavin stood up, wanting to get further away from it. He turned away from the door and looked around until his eyes landed on Michael once more, and no matter how badly he wanted, he couldn’t look anywhere else. After mustering up the courage, he took a deep breath and moved toward the sleeping figure, though every step felt like ten. When he did reach Michael, he got down next to him, and he just _stared_. Part of the moonlight was hitting the side of Michael’s face in a way that made him look like he was glowing.  

Tentatively, Gavin brought a hand up and stroked the area on Michael’s cheek that the light hit with two of his fingers. Michael was… so _real_ , and so _there_. And just the day before, Gavin had believed he was utterly _gone_. Gavin dropped his hand and moved away so that there was more space between them before he lied down on his side. For a while, he was facing Michael, taking in more of him, every detail about him that he already knew so well, yet it was as if he was seeing him for the first time. Like he’d been transported back to Michael’s 21 st birthday, back to that bar they’d first seen and met each other. He was back with his best friend Dan and he was sitting on that stool, admiring the adorable guy surrounded by his own friends across the bar from him.

But this wasn’t then. This was now. He idly wondered what would have happened if he hadn’t gone to that bar that night. This entire moment would be completely different, stripped of any emotional attachment, or the moment would just not have occurred at all. Or perhaps it still would have, because Michael would still be the kind of person he was, and he probably would have still rescued Gavin if he found him.

Except they wouldn’t know each other. There wouldn’t be anything between them but gratitude. Gavin would leave as soon as the sun rose with a farewell and Michael would send him his good luck, and that would be that. Because they would just be strangers.

Although, that was almost how Gavin felt now – that they were strangers again, except they weren’t. Everything was still there: every memory, every feeling, _everything_. So he had to roll over onto his other side, because he couldn’t look at him any longer, not when every single little thing he’d pushed back for months was attempting to breakthrough in mere seconds. He wouldn’t allow it, though. He couldn’t. It was too much.

And he was already so exhausted.

 

* * *

 

When he woke the third time, it was to the heavenly smell of _food_ being _cooked_. Curiosity and the disturbing growls his stomach was making was what led him to opening his eyes to investigate. Just a few feet away sat Michael, a small camp stove in front of him with a small pot on top. Michael could feel the pair of eyes on him, so he looked up from whatever he was stirring and seemed to hesitate before his lips twitched upward into a small smile.

Gavin’s stomach growled loudly again and Michael had to bite down on his lower lip to prevent his smile from widening.

“Um, are you hungry?” He asked, such a playful tone he was using too. Gavin rolled his eyes and sat up, not bothering to reply. Michael sighed. “It’s, uh, beef stew,” he went on, reaching behind him and holding up the empty can. Even the damn picture looked delicious to Gavin. “I got pretty lucky before I got into the city and found a few houses that were actually stocked with some food. I found this little burner in a store down the street and brought it back here with me. Even the shit that’s lost all its flavor tastes better warm.”

“Hmm,” Gavin hummed, hoping his disinterest would cause Michael to shut up. Michael frowned and returned his attention back to stirring the stew. Gavin then got to his feet and was pleasantly surprised to find that he was in a better condition than the night before.

“Where are you going?” Michael asked, staring up at him with big, lost eyes. For someone who was supposed to be close to being thirty, he sure knew how to make himself look much younger.

Gavin shook his head, trying to shake away the inching ache in his chest before he spoke, “You told me to rest and I did. I’m leaving now.” He started walking off.

“You’re gonna go out there without anything?” The question made Gavin halt in his tracks, because… well, he indeed did not have anything to protect himself with. “I know you’re good at handling those _things_ , but it’s better to be safe.”

Gavin huffed and turned back toward Michael, and he finally noticed the back strap he was wearing over his jacket with his sword inserted in its place on his back. He then eyed the backpack off to the side and hurried over to it, snatching it off the ground the second he reached it.

“Not going to stop me?” He disdainfully asked Michael.

“Why would I?” Michael shot back. “Just take whatever you need,” he mumbled that last part and averted his eyes. Gavin shrugged and opened up the backpack to search inside, and he immediately found a pistol that was loaded and ready for use. He placed that in his back pocket and reached inside again.

This time, he grabbed onto a handle, and when he pulled that out, he saw that it was the very same hunting knife Michael had always used before. And a crack in his wall was created.

“You know, there’s enough stew for more than one person…” Michael said to him, bringing back some of that playfulness to his tone. He was trying so hard, Gavin knew that well, and something about that worked. Gavin carelessly dropped the backpack, startling Michael, and Michael cocked his head to the side. “Gav?”

Gavin inhaled sharply, recovering himself from the persistent ache in him. Then he turned around and sat down across from Michael, the food the only thing between them. “After we’re done here, you’re coming with me.”

Michael’s eyebrows shot up at that. “You want me to go with you?”

If Gavin was being absolutely honest with himself, a part of him _wanted_ to scoff and jokingly ask, “Why do you sound so surprised?” But the other part of him, the part that always won now, was feeling the opposite, and he gave into to the feeling it was sending him.

“I need answers from you and you will give them to me,” he blandly told him, “but I also can’t sit here too long and do nothing while you give me your explanations; my friends are still out there somewhere. Therefore, yes, I want you to go with me, so we can talk more,” he made sure to keep his expression stern. However, he saw the corners of Michael’s lips twitch into another small smile, and he sighed quietly, the regret already bubbling up within him.


	10. Chapter 10

_“What are you thinking?”_

_Ryan took a moment to look up, but when he did, he found Ray standing just a few feet away from him. There was a small smile on Ray’s face and Ryan couldn’t help but feel Ray already knew what he was thinking. Was there any point in saying it, then? Ryan got to his feet, the corners of his lips twitching upward._

_“Something about him… I just… I don’t know,” he started, shaking his head and smile instantly faltering as thoughts of the British man they’d just met clogged his mind. “You saw and heard how he was talking to us. He sounds pretty messed up.”_

_“Well, of course he’s messed up. We all are. Whoever this_ ‘Michael’ _guy that he keeps talking about, really meant a lot to him. He’s just having trouble accepting the fact that he’s not with him anymore,” Ray explained. “Eventually, he will.”_

_“You want us to give him a chance, is that what you’re telling me?”_

_“Yeah, I do,” Ray nodded. “I get that you have a really_ hard _time trying to trust strangers – believe me,_ I know _, but Ryan, we also can’t let him go like that. He’s been defending himself with_ rocks _and anything else he can quickly find on the ground, and he’s completely alone. Let’s just be fucking honest – he’ll die without our help.”_

_“So, we can give him a few things and send him on his way,” Ryan suggested, shrugging a shoulder._

_“Ryan,” Ray sighed._

_“Alright, you know what, Ray… let’s do it. Let’s give the kid a chance. If it doesn’t work out-”_

_“We can kick him out, no questions asked,” Ray finished for him. “But hey, we could have easily left you behind, but we didn’t. I bet you’re happy about that, just like Gavin will be when I tell him we’re not leaving him behind.” He turned around and began heading outside where everyone else was waiting._

_“You could have! I wouldn’t have stopped you!” Ryan called out to him. Ray slowed his steps as he looked at him over his shoulder._

_“Yeah, but… I liked you,” he winked and Ryan rolled his eyes. Although, once Ray was out of sight, he looked away, a smile slowly replacing the frustration that had been on his face._

Everything had stopped. Every sound had ceased. It sounded like a ghost town, but none of them moved. Ryan remained on the ground next to Aaron, carefully listening for anything that sounded out of place. But no… there was absolute silence. Perhaps everyone had succeeded in killing each other and nobody escaped. Maybe they were safe to get up, yet Ryan wanted to wait it out a little longer, just in case.

But he was also growing anxious with the stabbing fear that the silence meant that Gavin was also dead.

He slowly opened his eyes and curled his hands into tight fists. If Gavin were dead, he was prepared to make someone pay for it.

 

* * *

 

“Okay, first question,” Gavin spoke up, trailing behind Michael, because he had no idea where in Nashville they were and Michael apparently knew the city very well by now.

Michael glanced back at him and gave him a nod. “I’m listening.”

“The people who were in charge of the high school… did you know any of them?”

“No.”

“You weren’t apart of their group, or whatever you wish to call it, in any shape or form?”

“Shape or form?” Michael squinted his eyes, looking at him again.

“Just answer the question.”

“No.”

“‘No’ you won’t answer the question or ‘no’ you weren’t apart of the group?”

Michael pinched the bridge of his nose, “As in _no_ , I wasn’t a part of their group in any fucking shape or form.” He reached the front door of a coffee shop and opened it before gesturing Gavin to follow. “It’s safer if we cut through here. The exit downstairs is blocked, but I know a way out from the second floor.” He moved aside, holding the door open for Gavin.

Gavin walked on in, paying Michael no attention as he started looking around the inside of the shop. The tables were tossed aside and destroyed, a small refrigerator was flat on the ground with its components gone, and up ahead where people would place their orders looked stripped clean of anything useful that may have been there once. The metal spiral staircase in the middle of the room was what Michael immediately walked up to, but Gavin stood still a few to read what the chalkboards behind the counter said. Whatever had previously been written there was wiped away and replaced with “No hope” in pink chalk. The second chalkboard also had a message written in green: We all die together.

“Come on, Gavin,” Michael told him, making his way upstairs. Gavin took a deep breath, scanning the place one last time, and then followed.

“Second question.”

“Go on.”

“How long have you been in Nashville?”

“Uh… a while.”

“That’s not answering my question.”

“About three months.”

Gavin halted in his tracks, his eyes squinting as he stared at the back of Michael. It took Michael a moment to finally realize Gavin was far behind, but when he did, he stopped and fully turned around to flash him a questionable look.

“Three months?” Gavin asked, cocking an eyebrow. Michael nodded. “Huh.”

“What?”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“Yeah, you didn’t have to. I know when something’s on your mind.”

Gavin groaned and began walking again, “There are about two particular questions I need to ask you.”

“Well, you’re already asking questions, Gav. Might as well ask those now,” Michael turned and continued on now that Gavin was following once more.

“See, they’re the kind of questions with the answers I really want to know. I’m just not sure I’ll get the answers I’m expecting.”

This time it was Michael was stopped walking first, but Gavin kept on going until they were standing side-by-side. Michael averted his eyes, merely watching Gavin through his peripheral vision, and he frowned.

“I tried going back,” he whispered. “I tried looking for you guys.”

“How hard, _Michael_? How _hard_ did you try?” Gavin demanded, clenching his teeth as he inched closer to him. Michael slowly looked up to meet his eye.

“I went back. You were gone. I didn’t want to go off into a completely different than you guys and never end up finding you, so… I started seeing the signs about Nashville and figured, that maybe, you guys would consider coming here. Now here you are,” the volume in Michael’s voice dropped to where he was practically mouthing those last words, but Gavin understood clearly. Michael grabbed the doorknob of the door that led to small balcony outside and as he turned it, Gavin placed his hand over his to stop him.

“For three months, you waited,” Gavin stated. Michael pursed his lips and refused to make any more eye contact. “And yes, Michael, here I am. But what if I never did show up? What would you have done, then?”

For a while, neither of them spoke another word or even tried moving away from each other. Although, Gavin couldn’t help constantly glancing at their hands touching, though he did attempt to ignore the way it was affecting him. However, his rapidly beating heart almost made it too difficult. And then Michael was gently pushing him out of the way to open the door. He didn’t give Gavin a chance to regain himself as he hurried out onto the balcony and climbed down a ladder, though he hopped off midway and landed on the grass a little gracelessly.

Swallowing the lump in his throat, Gavin shook his head and rushed after Michael. Michael peeked up once to make sure Gavin was there before running off into the alley. Gavin stepped off the ladder and huffed as he looked ahead and saw how far Michael had gotten already. However, he eventually managed to catch up by straining his energy.

“I don’t- believe you,” he sounded breathless, his chest growing heavy.

 “What do you mean?” Michael asked.

“You’ve been… here for three months… _how_?”

“It’s not that hard.”

“How… have you… kept enough… food?” Gavin wanted to scold himself for wanting to give up and lie down. He’d done plenty more running than this before, but he certainly underestimated how the events from the previous night truly affected him. Inhaling smoke from a terrible fire and getting slammed down onto the ground – head first – wasn’t quite ideal for his health.

“I’ve only been feeding myself and I was smart enough to look around for any more food to find when I felt like I was running low. And like I said, those houses I got the food from were loaded. I guess luck still exists, but I also made sure to spread out my meals so the food would last.”

“But those… people… how did they… not notice you… were staying around?”

“Look,” Michael slightly slowed down as they headed onto a narrow path between two houses. “They stayed on their side of the city and I stayed the hell away. I wasn’t going to let them know about me… except for yesterday. I was actually planning on stealing from them, but I stopped at a library nearby to sleep for the night. I was going to hit them this morning, and then the attack happened on them. So, I ran outside, saw the smoke, got closer, and you know the rest.”

Gavin squeezed his eyebrows together, though he didn’t bother saying any more about that. Michael had answered enough of his questions regarding that part of his curiosity anyway. Instead, Gavin momentarily closed his eyes and used the back of his hand to the wipe away the bangs sticking to his forehead from the sweat forming. From his eyes being shut, he wasn’t able to see the trashcan until he was practically falling over it.

The crashing sound the can made when Gavin had walked into it had Michael jumping back slightly. He then watched Gavin hopping around a little on one foot to regain his balance with a smile tugging at his lips. However, once Gavin was able to stand still again, he glared at Michael and Michael covered his mouth with his hand. Gavin cleared his throat and walked off normally, missing the small grin on Michael’s face. At the end of the path, Gavin turned to Michael again to ask where to go next.

That’s when he saw Michael’s grin completely falter as he gasped and said, “Oh, shit.” Gavin quickly followed Michael’s gaze, over on his left, and he tensed at the sight he saw down the road. _They_ appeared to be piling out of a three-story blue house and all around from the behind it. Five… ten… or maybe even more, but neither of them wanted to actually count.

“I-I think they see us- oh, _fuck_! Gavin, come on,” Michael grabbed Gavin’s hand before taking off down the other way on the road, away from them. Although Gavin stumbled for a bit, he eventually picked up his pace and ran alongside Michael, only half processing the fact that they were holding hands. He was too occupied with wanting to get the hell away to care. Also, if it weren’t for Michael’s support, he wouldn’t be running fast enough.

They were reaching a three-way street, but Michael continued on forward, not even considering left or right. All Gavin could hear was Michael’s and his own panting as they tried not letting the fatigue building up slow them down. He could hear the echo of their thundering footsteps on the pavement bouncing off the walls the atmosphere of the desolated neighborhood. And he could also hear the increasing, _hungry_ growls that were following them.

Another three-way street came into view and Michael choice forward again. But with a house being at the very end of the long street, they eventually had no choice but to go right or left. Michael hesitated on which way to go, though, while Gavin stared over his shoulder and saw how quickly those things were heading toward them.

“Michael, _hurry_ ,” he begged, not even realizing the urgency and fear in his tone.

“I’m trying to remember which way to go without losing track of the school too much!” Michael responded, and by the sound of his tone, he was just as anxious.

“I don’t care! Let’s just hide somewhere already!”

Michael bit down on his lower lip and it was clear he was still undecided, so Gavin groaned and tugged on his hand as he chose left for them. There was a mansion down that way, with a wide, dried out lawn where a few more of those creatures were wandering around.

“Ah, for god’s sake,” Gavin hissed as he noticed them. “I… I-I chose the wrong way!” At this point, everything he said was breathy, almost as if his tongue was too big for his mouth.

“Who cares, just keep running past them,” Michael said as he gently pushed him forward. The ones on the lawn let out an unforgiving growl as they spotted the two before going after them. Gavin and Michael could only the short, iron fence would slow them down.

They hurried past more houses, sickening feelings increasing within their stomachs as they imagined more creatures bursting out from them. They just needed to get the hell away from the neighborhoods, because of all the time Michael had spent there, he’d never seen so many of them. Where the fuck were they coming from, he wondered. Had they always been there and he just never noticed because he never bothered sneaking into any of the homes?

From how quickly they were moving, Gavin only caught glimpses of the houses, and most of what he saw was similar to each one; they each had their windows boarded up, but only some of them had doors blocked by various furniture. Those houses with their doors broken off the hinges were the ones he was weary of. Although, he mentally told himself to block every thought from his mind to avoid terrifying himself more than he already was. They had enough chasing him; he didn’t need to imagine more.

There was a curve on the road that gave them the only choice of going left, but Michael was able to spot another narrow path between homes. It would lead them right to the other side instead of having to all the way around.

“Gav!” He pointed to it, his grip tightening on Gavin’s hand, and the two of them headed on down that path.

The good news: they had a decent distance between them and the herd. The bad news: the herd still hadn’t lost any sight of them.

“We’re… turning right... at the end!” Michael struggled to say, breathing as heavily now as Gavin had been. He was reaching his limit, Gavin could tell, especially from the way he was beginning to lean forward more like he was ready to fall. And then he did fall, or rather, he tripped, over his own foot. His hand separated from Gavin’s before he hit the rough, dirt ground.

At first, he was just sprawled out like that without making movements. But finally, he raised his head and Gavin noticed how right side of Michael’s face was plastered from the loose dirt on the ground. And when Michael picked himself up higher to clutch his chest, Gavin was tempted to yell at him to get up, because he wasn’t feeling _wonderful_ , either. Except… Michael’s breathing was coming out in short spurts that sounded painful just listening to.

“Michael, we have to go,” Gavin reminded him as he glanced back and forth between Michael and the oncoming herd. Despite his lungs giving him a rough time, Michael nodded and pushed himself up onto his feet, but he continued clutching his chest.

“I… I can’t… it… fucking hurts… my chest feels cold… I can’t breathe…” He was slouching as he spoke. “Go… I’ll… I’ll hold them off.” Gavin pursed his lips, his hand reaching back to grab the pistol he left in the backpack’s side pocket.

He hated to make noise, but leaving Michael behind was never an option. Besides, they could both use the small break from running. He stepped in front of Michael and began taking care of a few of the creatures getting much too close for comfort. Being too tired to even speak, Michael let Gavin do as he wanted while he used the short moment to relax, so that he could properly breathe again.

Four of the closest ones were down and while the rest of them were still a good distance away, Gavin grabbed by the sleeve of Michael’s denim jacket and pulled him with him as he started to run again. Michael swallowed the lump in his throat; he could feel the breakfast he’d eaten threatening to come out, but he held it in as he moved his own feet to keep up with Gavin.  

Staying to the right on every turn, they eventually found themselves back into the city. Even so, from the looks of it, the school was still a long way to go. Yet, for their sake, they rushed into the nearest laundromat for a quick rest. It appeared to be the least uninviting building in the area and after getting inside, they realized that to be true; nothing or no one else was in there with them. While Gavin blocked off the door by placing a chair underneath the doorknob, Michael fell onto the floor to rest. Gavin spun around, his eyes widening in panic as he all but threw himself at Michael.

“Michael...? _Michael_!” He shouted, shaking the other violently. Michael groaned softly and attempted to wave him off. Well, it wasn’t exactly a response, but it was something. Gavin visibly relaxed and lowered his voice as he proceeded to ask, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah… yeah, I’m fine. I’m… just tired. I ran too fast… in the beginning – I fucked myself,” Michael breathlessly answered as he rolled over onto his back. Gavin slowly raised his eyebrows.

“Can you breathe now?”

“Yeah.”

“Hmm,” Gavin nodded. “Okay, good, you’re stable.”

Michael opened one eye to peek up at Gavin. “Wha-” and he was cut off as Gavin’s fist made contact with the corner of his mouth. “Ow!” He grunted, bringing a hand up to touch his lips. He instantly saw two of his fingers get covered in his own blood. “Gavin, _what the fuck_!”

Gavin then stood and moved away from Michael, that emotionless expression of his from earlier was back. He was a bit wobbly as he walked, still recovering from the running they just did, but he managed as best as he could to hold his ground. But now his knuckles also hurt. He reached the washing machines and leaned against one of them, and he didn’t even notice Michael had been following him.

“What the _fuck_ is wrong with you?” Michael practically spat. Gavin scoffed before tuning his head to lock eyes with Michael.

“You’re asking _me_ what’s wrong,” Gavin pushed himself off the washing machine and walked until he was mere inches away from Michael, “One hundred and ninety days, Michael… for one hundred and ninety days, I believed you to be dead.” Michael softened his expression at that. Gavin, however, gritted his teeth, “But I come here to Nashville, almost find myself burned alive, and guess _who_ comes to my rescue? Of all people, it’s _you_. You who’s supposed to be-” Gavin abruptly paused and averted his eyes. “… Dead,” he whispered. Michael tentatively placed a hand on Gavin’s cheek, his thumb gently stroking the small wound there that still needed to heal.

And Gavin’s wall collapsed.

Slowly, his eyes watered, and when he spoke again, there was a crack in his voice, “Where were you, Michael?” Michael put his hand down and pulled Gavin into a tight embrace.

There they stood – Gavin letting out quiet, choked out sobs and Michael repeatedly apologizing into the crook of his neck. And even though they were both beyond exhaustion, both having the persistent urge to close their eyes for hours, and both sticky with sweat and even some blood, they still felt better than they had in so long.


	11. Chapter 11

Gavin couldn’t quite say how long it took the two of them to finally reach the high school. It felt as if they had been trapped inside that laundromat much longer than they should have. After they saw the herd walk on by, they agreed to wait it out a bit more, so that those things could get further away from them, and to further restore their own strength and energy. Once they were sure enough time had passed, they exited out and Michael continued to lead the way.

But instead of hounding Michael with interrogation type questions, Gavin silently walked next to him, so close that the backs of their hands brushed against each other. In fact, neither of them really made a noise until they reached the school – or what used to be the school. Michael was rendered speechless at the scene unfolded in front of them, the one of the building being nothing but burnt ruins and debris covering the entire area. Something that used to stand so tall and wide now barely had any walls up and its entire roof was just… gone.

Gavin was the first to step forward. He slowly approached where one of the entrances used to be and took a peek inside, and his mouth immediately fell open. Along the debris lied several bodies, burnt to a crisp. Some evidently had been clutching things in their hands, things they may have tried and utterly failed to escape with. And some bodies were hardly visible.

“What is it?” Michael finally asked, walking up to Gavin from behind. Gavin didn’t answer – he simply couldn’t find the words. Michael’s eyebrows twitched together, but as he soon as he took a look for himself, he understood Gavin’s silence. “Oh.”

“It’s terrible, isn’t it?” Gavin eventually spoke, turning his head to face Michael. “I want to say I’m not absolutely shocked, but of all the things I’ve seen, this has to be the worst.”

Michael pursed his lips and carefully made his way further into the building, despite Gavin warning him that parts of the ceiling that was still hanging could fall on top of him. Michael took his chances to investigate and whether he was happy or not that he did was a little conflicting, because he ended up finding a sort of treasure that he would have never imagined finding. Especially not in a place such as this one.

Sticking slightly out of a pile of broken wood and metal (what presumably must have been a desk) was a barely salvaged photograph. Its edges were burnt and the entirety of the photo itself was very much crumbled. However, Michael was still able to clearly see the person that photo was meant to capture. He crouched down and carefully pulled it out of its spot. He then held it up closer to his face, a frown forming over his features.

There was absolutely no doubt that it was Geoff Ramsey, with that casual side smile of his and laid back posture as he leaned against a balcony railing. And that’s when Michael also noticed the arm of someone standing next to him and realized the photo had been folded. He flipped it over and raised his eyebrows at the woman he saw – blonde hair, warm smile, and septum piercing. There was something about her that seemed so comforting to Michael, he couldn’t look away.

At this point, Gavin had forced himself to enter the building and join Michael into the room he’d wandered into. Upon looking over his shoulder, he saw the photo Michael was holding and gasped lightly.

“I know her,” he said, bringing Michael’s attention to him, “She tried to help get out of the building before you came along. Her name is-”

“Griffon,” Michael cut him off. Gavin cocked his head to the side, an eyebrow raising questioningly.

“How did you know that? I thought you didn’t know any of these people.”

Michael sighed and stood up fully before turning toward Gavin. “I didn’t know her, but I did know her boyfriend.” Now this only increased Gavin’s confusion until Michael gently unfolded the photo to reveal both halves, and Gavin’s expression softened.

“I hope she made it out,” was the only thing he could think to say.

“Yeah, um, let’s get the fuck out of here and look for everyone else,” Michael mumbled as he folded the photo back up and put it into his pocket. Gavin couldn’t agree more with that.

As they exited the building and began making their way down the street, Gavin let out a frustrated groan as something he didn’t want to think about clogged his mind. Michael looked at him worriedly.

“What are we to do if we don’t find them?” Gavin asked, eyes widening as he realized how high that probability was. He then halted in his tracks and Michael did as well. For a moment, they merely stared at one another, too deep in their thoughts to say anything out loud.

Finally, Michael shrugged. “What we’re supposed to do, Gavin. We keep… surviving. I know it sucks to think about not seeing them again, but…”

“No, I understand,” Gavin nodded. “Believe me, I do. I didn’t give up when you left, but I’ve been surviving in this hell with them since the beginning. I just feel like I’m not quite sure how to survive without them.” Michael stepped forward until there was only mere inches between them. He reached out and grabbed Gavin’s hands, holding them tightly in his own.

“I was alone for six months, figuring out how to do everything by myself. It’s not easy, especially with how many of those god damn things are around, but we can get through it together without a problem, if it comes down to it.”

Gavin took a deep breath and nodded once more. Well, if it had to come down to him being alone in this world with just one person, there was no way he was going to complain that it was Michael. That was how it would have been from the start anyway, had he not walked out on Michael days prior. It was probably meant to be this way, because despite _everything_ that happened between them, they still somehow found their way back to each other.

In a moment filled with the sudden urge to close the little space left, Gavin leaned in and desperately captured Michael’s lips with his own. A part of him felt as if it was another thing he needed to do to make sure this wasn’t a cruel joke and he was really with _Michael_ , but another part of him just _wanted_ to feel and taste him again. Michael returned the same amount of desperation in the kiss, his hands even letting go of Gavin’s so that he could wrap his arms around his waist.

And when they pulled apart, they both saw someone standing nearby, watching them, from their peripheral vision. They turned their heads and raised their eyebrows in surprise as they came face-to-face with Joel. Joel just gaped at them, but after a while, he clamped his mouth shut and threw his hands up.

“Hey, Gavin! I know we said we wouldn’t see each other again, but I’ve got news for you! Michael’s _alive_ ,” he feigned the excitement in his tone. Michael and Gavin blinked at him, unsure of how to respond to that. Joel slowly put his hands down and sighed. “Oh, right, you already know that,” he turned away slightly and mumbled something under his breath that sounded along the lines of, “Which means we traveled all this way for nothing.”

Michael’s lips curled up a little as he shook his head. “What the fuck are you doing here alone, Joel?”

“The other geniuses went a different way to look for… whoever is all in your group, and they told me to stay behind in case Gavin showed up, and what do you know!” Although the expression Joel wore was that of slight annoyance, he reached into his back pocket and pulled out a pair of necklaces, “Lindsay even gave these back to me just in case, and I’m glad she did.”

Gavin’s face brightened and Joel almost couldn’t resist smiling as he walked up to them to hand them back over. Michael and Gavin took them from him and looked them over in their hands.

“Holy shit, I didn’t think I’d ever see this again,” Michael admitted, grinning as he touched the diamond pendant. Neither he nor Joel caught sight of Gavin’s face falling as Gavin looked closely at his own necklace.

For the time being, Michael put his in his pocket where the photo was, and turned to Joel. “Do you know where Lindsay and everyone else is now?”

“They should be heading back over here. It’s been a while and they promised to be back a little past evening,” Joel pointed to the sky, “It is evening. We can meet them halfway.” Michael nodded. Joel turned and began walking with Michael happily following suit, but when Michael glanced over his shoulder and noticed Gavin was still standing, he stopped and alerted Joel. Joel halted in his tracks and waited as Michael hurried back over to Gavin.

“Hey, Gav. What are you doing? Let’s go.”

Gavin said nothing. He just kept staring at the necklace. Michael resisted rolling his eyes, not understanding.

“Gav? You were _literally_ just saying how you were worried you weren’t going to see Ryan and everyone else again. And now that we can have a chance at finding them with Joel’s group, you don’t want to go?”

“It’s not that,” Gavin whispered.

“Then _what_ is it?”

Gavin closed the hand the necklace was in, and he finally looked up to meet Michael’s eye. “It’s you,” he said. Michael raised his eyebrows, taken aback.

“What?”

“I’ve been so _angry_ since you… well, _died_ … and…” Gavin looked away, unable to the bare Michael’s gaze. “I don’t want to lose you _again_. I’ve had to so many times already, I don’t know how many more times I can handle it.”

“Gav, you won’t lose me”

“How do you _know_? You don’t _know_. Anything can happen!”

“Yeah, and anything could have happened back then, too! You or me could have been run over while crossing the street, or… I don’t fucking know – somebody could have broken into our home and _murdered_ one of us-”

“- _Michael_ ,” Gavin interjected, crossing his arms.

“-And sure it’s easier now, but fucking shit, Gavin! Why are you going to waste your time _worrying_ about what can happen when you can… _not_ do that. I feel like I had a good point going on there, but I fucked myself- you still get what I mean, _okay_?” Michael placed his hands on Gavin’s shoulders, ignoring how Gavin looked more baffled than anything. “Things are going to happen to you and me, Gavin, just like they’ve always have. We get through it each time.”

“What if one day it doesn’t work out this way anymore? What if one day we really-”

“Stop, stop… fucking… _stop_!” And Michael huffed while Gavin furrowed his eyebrows.

Joel shook his head. He wasn’t even going to pretend he wasn’t clearly listening to every word those two were exchanging. And he wasn’t even going to act like he wasn’t wondering if they had always been that way with each other. He figured they had.

“So, you want us to just _go with it_?” Gavin asked after it seemed Michael wouldn’t interrupt him again.

“I’m just saying, Gavin, that we’ll feel better if we just don’t think about it every little bad thing that can happen. That’s how I got myself through these months. Instead of lying around and thinking, ‘Holy shit, I’m never going to see Gavin again’, I kept pushing forward with the belief that I would see you again. And I wasn’t wrong.”

Gavin nodded. “You’re right. You’re absolutely right.”

Michael gently cupped Gavin’s face, a smile forming on his own. “I love you, Gavin. So, let’s just go find our friends already.” Gavin took another deep breath, though it came out shakier than he had expected. Either way, he returned the smile, although much smaller than Michael’s.

“I love you, too, Michael.”

Now Joel really couldn’t stop himself from rolling his eyes and then smiling to himself. Gavin and Michael rushed back over to Joel’s side.

The three of them were finally able to make their way down the street where they eventually ran into Lindsay, Meg, Burnie, Ashley, Adam, and Chris who were already walking alongside Ryan, Aaron, Barbara, Jack, Miles, and Arryn.

When Ryan and the others had gotten up from their hiding spot and went to look around the ruins, they had come across Gavin’s backpack – utterly ruined by the fire. And they left in a hurry, frantically searching around in another part of the city for any sign of the Brit, because they refused to believe what they feared. It was when they had finished their search for the day that they heard voices nearby. Ryan clutched his rifle as he peeked around the corner, ready to attack or shoot anyone he needed to, but he recognized the people, and relaxed.

They hadn’t seen Gavin either, though, only taking more of their hope away.

So when they met up with Joel and saw two other people following behind, and then realized those people were not only Gavin, but Gavin, the Gavin who genuinely smiled, and _Michael_ , they thought it was the exhaustion finally catching up to them.

But it wasn’t. The two of them were really _there_.

And it was then they realized that, perhaps some good could still come out of this world. They just had to make the best out of it. It was all they had left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I originally wrote this drawled out explanation, but I’m going to keep it simpler: I am officially taking a break from writing fanfics. I don’t want to say that I’m permanently going to stop writing fics, because I do see myself writing one shots here and there whenever I get a really good idea that I just have to write, but I do not see myself writing long, over ten chapters long, fics anymore. I do realize that I still have fics that are wip and those will get finished, but at a later time when inspiration for those hit. 
> 
> I also mentioned in my TLOU au that if people wanted me to write more of that, I will, and that still stands true, because I do have much inspiration to write that. Also, what I have in mind, if I do continue with it, will only make it 1-2 chapters longer, so… that won’t be a big deal to write and finish. Anyway, I might end up writing another long fic with more than ten chapters sometime in the future, but for now, there will only be one shots, if anything (and the eventual continuation and completion of my current wip fics). That’s probably why you may have noticed For The Hell of It is on official hiatus. Like I said, it will get done eventually. 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who’s stuck around and actually read one or more of my fics. I am going to continue reading fics, though, because I can’t get enough of the amazing writers in the ragehappy fandom. Oh, don’t forget you can follow me on tumblr ([queenweisss](http://queenweisss.tumblr.com/)), twitter ([heytheregisela](https://twitter.com/heytheregisela)), and youtube ([heytheregisela](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC9-EIuf9cY3o64N7T1aX9zg)). I love and appreciate all of you. You’re the best supporters and I could not say “thank you” enough, for always being there and leaving comments/kudos/etc. You never failed to make me smile and encourage me to keep writing. 
> 
> I said this would be shorter than the original post, but I think it ended up being the same length. I can’t shut up! Haha, okay, another thanks for reading this sequel. :) Shout out to Melissa (joelslegs/ the Joel to my Adam, tbh) for her beautiful comments and support.
> 
> Alright… well… it’s been fun. LOVE YOU!


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